17 funny shark quotes - Wordgag

The most avoided species of shark is the Loan.

May 23, 2026

Like shark attacks on humans, it’s actually extremely rare. The majority of antique, porcelain headed dolls aren’t interested in murdering people.

May 23, 2026

There should be a Jaws sequel where the shark finally gets arrested for his crimes and goes to jail.

May 23, 2026

I call my period Shark week. I want to eat everything, I’m snapping at people, I feel huge, people are scared of me, and there is blood everywhere.

May 22, 2026

Your odds are greater of being killed by a coconut rather than a shark and this is exactly why I don’t swim in coconut-infested waters.

May 22, 2026

If you ever get attacked by a shark, just be a good sport about it and let it eat you. Hey, look on the bright side: It’s a rare occurrence, so you’re special.

May 22, 2026

Shark tooth necklaces are the perfect accessory if you want to look tough but also tell the world, “I’ve been to a gift shop.”

May 22, 2026

Imagine how scary sharks would be if they wore necklaces made out of our teeth.

May 21, 2026

If you think swimming with dolphins is expensive, you should try swimming with sharks. It cost me an arm and a leg!

May 21, 2026

Going to the beach the day after watching Jaws hits different.

May 21, 2026

When there’s food around, our cat is like an adorable, fluffy shark circling round.

May 20, 2026

Taking a dog named shark to the beach is a bad idea.

May 20, 2026

Showing your emotions to the wrong people is like bleeding next to a shark.

Apr 1, 2026

A shark could swim faster than me, but I could probably run faster than a shark. So, in a triathlon, it would all come down to who is the better cyclist.

Mar 31, 2026

Sharks are orcs, dolphins are elves.

Mar 31, 2026

A relationship is like a shark, it looks better on TV.

Mar 28, 2026

If I was in Jaws, instead of wishing for a bigger boat, I probably would have just asked for a smaller shark.

Mar 28, 2026