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New funny quotes: 750 this month

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Updated: May 19, 2026

 

 

 

 

Funny fingernail quotes

Me: I have a cut under my fingernail. Universe: Excellent, I will send you an unusually high number of encounters with citrus fruit.

Posted onApr 1, 2026

I’ve cut my fingernails too short and now I can’t open my shower gel. What’s the point of being well-groomed if I can’t smell like mangos?

Posted onMar 25, 2026

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