I stay up late every night, regret it in the morning, and the next day I do it all over again.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

Don’t drink to forget me, you’ll end up seeing me double.

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If I could go back in time, I’d probably stop Bruce Willis from saving us from that asteroid.

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Don’t hate me, date me!

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If you like true crime stories, I highly recommend the history of the Catholic Church.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

Your honor, my client would like to play on his phone for a little bit

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You ever have one of those days that require the use of both of your middle fingers?

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My husband said I use a lot of makeup, so I showed him some makeup tutorials on TikTok and I don’t think he’ll be making that mistake again.

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Don’t rush me, I’m still deciding whether I’ll be productive or not today!

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I prefer people who actually know what’s going on.

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Carefully choosing which wine to pair with a McRib.