Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • My hobby is misidentifying dinosaurs so my daughter can correct me.
  • Kim Kardashian wants her ashes to be scattered in the sea after her death. As if there wasn’t enough plastic there already.
  • If it hurts you more than it hurts them, you are holding the taser wrong.
  • Me: what can possibly go wrong though. Anxiety: I’m glad you asked.
  • When I die, I hope I’m remembered for my ability to take any bad situation and make it worse.
  • The first sin in the Bible was eating an apple. The second was murder. That escalated quickly.