I haven’t been with anyone in 3 years. I feel sorry for my next boyfriend. He might not make it through the day. Posted onMar 25, 2026 by slickboy in Funny Quotes 💾 Save Image Commentary:Sounds like your next boyfriend should start carbo-loading now! 🏋️♂️😂🍝 Related funny posts 🤝 Every girl keeps an extra boyfriend and calls him ‘best friend’. Of course I stay hydrated. Carbohydrated. I came home to find my boyfriend mopping the floor and my first thought was, “who’d he kill?” If anyone wants to sponsor me, I’ll be running a 0.002K this weekend to raise awareness for laziness. I think it broke my boyfriend’s heart when I said he couldn’t have Salma Hayek for Valentine’s Day.