Commentary:
Sounds like my math skills are taking a vacation too, but who can say no to a trip that calculates its own fun? 😂✈️💸
97 Funny anyone quotes
I finally understand why older people grocery shop at 7 a.m. It’s peaceful as hell, and there’s barely anyone in the store.
Commentary:
Sounds like a VIP shopping experience without the crowds—early bird gets the peace and quiet! 🐣🥐🛒
Adults having breakfast at a friend’s apartment before heading off to work is the biggest lie television ever told anyone.
Commentary:
"When I try breakfast at a friend's place, it turns into brunch-slash-my-new-job-hunt because we're both late 😅🥓⏰"
Anyone else walk to their airport gate to visually confirm it exists before going to find food? Or is that just me?
Commentary:
Guilty as charged! I can't let my gate remain a flight of fancy before feasting. ✈️🍔😅
I’m pretty sure emojis were invented so introverts don’t have to say anything to anyone.
Commentary:
"Finally, a language where my awkward silence can be both seen and understood! 😂🤫🙃"
“I’m great at saving money, as long as I don’t go anywhere, see anyone, or open my eyes.”
Commentary:
The secret to financial success: become a hermit with narcoleptic tendencies 🏡🛌💰😴
Some people come into your life to remind you why you don’t wanna let anyone into your life.
Commentary:
When life gives you people, make sure there's an escape plan 🍋🚪😂
They say white people don’t have their own culture, but I just got invited to a gender reveal party for a dog, and there’s no way we appropriated that from anyone else.
Commentary:
I can't wait for the bark-mitzvah next! 🎉🐶💥
Is there anyone here old enough to remember when typing was a class in high school?
Commentary:
Remembering the days when typing was a class and not just a skill from texting by osmosis 🤔👴🖨️#ThrowbackTyping
Anyone else get excited about going to bed because you know there’ll be coffee in the morning, or is that just me?
Commentary:
Espresso-ing my excitement for morning already! ☕😴✨