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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

I have read that there are imaginary pregnancies. The belly gets bigger and bigger, but there is no baby inside. Finally a diagnosis.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

It’s now socially acceptable again to clap when the plane lands.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

You know you’re really stressed when you start getting on your own nerves.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

When people tell me “you’re going to regret that in the morning”, I sleep until noon because I am a problem solver.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

Agriculture can’t possibly be a dying industry. Bot farms are booming.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

The point of life is going to a good restaurant and getting two cocktails with dinner. That’s it.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

Thanks for your email! Unfortunately, I have filled my pockets with stones and am making my way to the sea.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

God: “Free will was a bad idea. I should have charged for it.”

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

Airbnb should have an option if you just want to use someone’s bathroom for a few minutes.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

If you take a social media sabbatical, don’t announce it. Just make your last post something fun like “I wonder if there’s a bear in this cave?”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

807 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,969

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,969

Updated

45 minutes ago

Users Online

3,420

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Threads:

Everyone should be more grateful for what I don’t say.

Making waves on Facebook:

Riding a bike is an insane concept. You just sit and run at the same time.

Trending via Discord:

I don’t even want to talk about the things I had to do to that elf to get back on the nice list.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Old age is like a glorious, extended long weekend, but you always know Monday’s coming.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I had to quit my job because people kept falling in love with me there.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

When I say I’m saving myself for marriage, what I mean is you won’t know how annoying I am until it’s too late.

Reported on Reddit:

If my wife doesn’t win anything on this $2 scratch ticket, it’s going to go down as one of the worst birthday presents ever.

Trending via Pinterest:

Convinced my kid her harmonica didn’t work because the instructions were missing.

Spreading quickly via X:

I can now tell the hour of the day by which part of my body needs a heating pad.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Going to bed early is easy, going to sleep early is a whole other set of problems.

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Funny continents quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

807 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,969

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,969

Updated

45 minutes ago

Users Online

3,434

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

My brain is 80% song lyrics.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

Not sure who needs to hear this, but make your bloody bed.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

I got all my marriage skills from watching Al Bundy.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

Another day of explaining to mom that New York is big and the footage she saw wasn’t shot on my street.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

My mother told me there is a girl for me in every corner of the earth, but unfortunately the earth is round.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

If we start dating now, we could be arguing on a road trip by August.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

I’m just here trying to spread a little joy while the world burns. Is that so wrong?

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

Why are these idiots only giving robots two arms?

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

The word synergy sounds like a mix of the words sin and energy. Like, to be debauched but to do it with flair and zest.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

Do I need to have seen the Tokyo Olympics in order to understand the Paris ones?

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Slack:

Spent 20 minutes training ChatGPT to write the perfect anniversary note for my wife, so don’t try to tell me I’m not romantic.

Just landed via Reddit:

I’m a person who wants to do a lot of things trapped in the body of a person who wants to sleep a lot.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Nostalgia isn’t as good as it used to be.

Just shared via Facebook:

When a woman texts you three questions, you should only answer one. She will love that.

Reported on TikTok:

The phrase “don’t take this the wrong way” has a 0% success rate.

Spotted on Telegram:

Attention: will the owner of a small blue planet with tectonic plates please attend to your vehicle. It is overheating.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

One night stands just make more sense for single people. Why would you need a night stand on both sides of the bed?

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Livin’ la vida vodka!

Making waves on TikTok:

Took a personality test and the results just said “uh-oh”

Trending via Instagram:

I called the cops on my own party once because I was ready to go to bed.

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