Funny kidnap quotes

Funny text about family shopping fears and funny mistrust on Facebook Marketplace.

Wife bought something on FB Marketplace, but she’s afraid she’ll get kidnapped, so she sends me to pick it up from a guy whose wife sent him because she’s afraid to get kidnapped.

Commentary:
When two scared warriors meet for the legendary exchange of mildly used household goods 😅🤝🛍️ #BraveHearts

Witty text about safety and cake humorously suggesting weight deters kidnapping.

The more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe, Eat cake.

Commentary:
"Here's a deliciously logical excuse to indulge in cake 🍰 – safety first! Remember, a little extra fluff can be your best defense against being whisked away 🍰🦸‍♂️. So go ahead, treat yourself to some cake and build your own personal fortress! Stay safe, stay sweet! 💪🍰 #CakeIsLife"