Wordgag ツ

More funny quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: Could you set a lightsaber on low and use it as a back scratcher?

Commentary:
🤔💡 "Asking the real questions here! Who needs a regular old back scratcher when you have a lightsaber, right? 💫✨ Just be sure to keep it on low setting unless you want to accidentally turn your back into a Jedi training ground. May the force of relaxation be with you! 🚀🌟"
5 months ago
Share →: My phone screen is brighter than my future.

Commentary:
"Looks like your phone screen is shining bright like a diamond while your future is still searching for the light switch. 💎📱 Keep your screen dimmed and your future prospects sparking with potential! 🔦💡"
5 months ago
Share →: My mind is like my web browser. 19 tabs are open, 3 are frozen and I have no idea where the music is coming from.

Commentary:
Ah, the chaotic symphony of the modern mind! 🤯🎶 Just like a web browser with tabs galore, we navigate through the endless labyrinth of thoughts, with some frozen in confusion and a mysterious soundtrack playing in the background. 🕸️💭🎵 Embrace the pandemonium, for it is the soundtrack of creativity in full swing! 😅🎭 #MultitaskingMaster
5 months ago
Share →: Don’t break someone’s heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206 of them.

Commentary:
"Remember, it's cheaper to buy a new set of bones than to fix a broken heart! 💔💪 Breakups just got a whole lot more practical! #BoneStrong"
5 months ago
Share →: You ever tried driving the speed limit and thought, “They can’t be serious.”

Commentary:
When the speed limit feels like a mere suggestion rather than a rule 😂🚗💨 Who are these mythical creatures actually following it?? 🤔 #LifeinaFastLane #NeedforSpeed
5 months ago
Share →: Monday morning looks like Jack Nicholson breaking through the door in The Shining.

Commentary:
"Monday morning be like… Here's Jack! 👀🚪😱 Who knew the real horror movie was starting the work week? #MondayStruggles"
5 months ago
Share →: I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.

Commentary:
"Trying to change the world without the source code is like trying to cook without a recipe – disastrous! 🌎💻 #DeveloperDilemma"
5 months ago
Share →: When I take a shower I’m: 5% cleaning myself, 10% singing, 85% making life changing decisions.

Commentary:
"Ah, the mystical sanctuary of the shower: where reality blends with reverie! 🚿🎶💡 5% cleansing those worries away, 10% perfecting your opera skills, and a whopping 85% plotting to conquer the world… or at least deciding what's for dinner! The shower curtain knows all your secrets, right? 😉"
5 months ago
Share →: What idiot called it Catfishing your Tinder Contacts and not Playing With Matches?

Commentary:
"Why do we call it Catfishing when we could be Playing With Matches? 🐟🔥 It's like choosing between a purr-fect crime and a fiery disaster! 🔥😼 Let's match things up and see who will be left smoldering in the end! 🔥😜"
5 months ago
Share →: When you’re over 40 and a part of your body starts hurting for no reason that is nature sending a “what ya doing?” text.

Commentary:
Oh, look who's getting messages from Mother Nature herself! 🌿📱 Must be that age when your body decides to spam you with aches and pains like a guilt-tripping ex! 😂 Better reply before she starts sending those passive-aggressive joint pains! Just nature's way of asking, "Are you sure you want to keep partying like you're 20?" 🎉🥳 #GettingOlderButNotWiser