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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

Got possessed by a demon once, and everyone was like, “OMG, did you do something with your hair?”

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

She said she liked animals but apparently all the fruit flies around my apartment was a “turn off”

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

Now I get why my grandma got up early to have a little coffee by herself.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

My neighbor said he heard me having sex today but it was just me standing in front of my air conditioner.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

January feels like a schizophrenic episode.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

Can’t, trying to piece together today’s news from social media posts.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

Who called them cat allergies and not meowlergies?

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

My toxic trait is that I give my friends mental health advice when I belong in an asylum.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Welcome to your 40s, the best part of your day is now the heated seats in your car after a long day.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

Sorry, I’m late. I got caught up at home being happy.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Dec 31, 2025

3,421

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Discord:

I see why grandmas used to cook dinner at 3 p.m. and sit down the rest of the day.

Just landed via Slack:

I don’t miss calls, I stare at them.

Just landed via Threads:

Can you imagine being a 7th grade girl and being able to see your crush’s bedroom during Zoom math class.

Trending via X:

Nobody could stop me if I wasn’t tired all the time.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

There’s really nothing as pathetic as watching a sad little man argue with Grok in hopes of manipulating the conversation to get an answer he wants.

Seen just now on Reddit:

At the gym, everyone thinks exclusively about how little weight I can lift and how quickly I’m out of breath, because the world revolves around me.

Making waves on TikTok:

Manipulative people really be like “oh, so now I’m the bad guy for being the bad guy?”

Making waves on Slack:

I have never seen an alcohol company using a drunk person for any advertising, are they ashamed of their customers?

Spotted on Threads:

I was talking to someone and combined “all good” and “no worries” by saying “all worries”, which was a lot more accurate.

Spotted on X:

If anyone wants to watch the Super Bowl on a large 8k TV, come on over to my place (and bring a large 8k TV).

Funny conditioner quotes

Funny conditioner quotes are the perfect way to add some bubbly humor to your hair care routine! 💁‍♀️✨ Whether your locks are silky smooth or a glorious mess, these witty sayings will make you smile every time you reach for that bottle. 😂🧴 Get ready to laugh, relate, and maybe even share a few with your besties during your next shampoo sesh! 💇‍♂️💬 #HairGoals #ConditionerComedy

New funny conditioner quotes 👇

I should’ve been an air conditioner because all I do is vent.

0

2 months ago

air, air conditioner, attitude, conditioner, cooling, humor, i, joke, personality, sarcastic, vent
To the people who have only fans, what’s stopping you from upgrading to an air conditioner?

0

2 months ago

air, air conditioner, conditioner, context, fans, humor, only, people, remark, upgrade, witty, witty remark
If the shampoo and the conditioner finish at the same time, one of them faked it.

0

2 months ago

bathroom, conditioner, conspiracy, finish, grooming, humor, joke, relationship, same, shampoo, time
My neighbor said he heard me having sex today but it was just me standing in front of my air conditioner.

0

2 months ago

air, air conditioner, conditioner, embarrassment, front, funny moment, having, humor, just, me, misunderstanding, moment, neighbor, noise, relationship, sex, standing, today
I feel like I should give my air conditioner a plaque for employee of the month.

0

2 months ago

air, air conditioner, appreciation, award, conditioner, employee, give, humor, i, month, plaque, workplace

All funny conditioner quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

81 shares on Reddit this month:

Googling phone numbers you don’t recognize instead of actually answering the phone.

82 shares on Facebook this month:

Bro, are you a black hole, because you suck energy and light?

92 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Everyone’s an empath until I need to borrow some cash.

60 shares on Pinterest this month:

I childproofed my house but the kids still get in somehow.

91 shares on Slack this month:

If someone asks you why you’re single, just answer with: “Got lucky.”

34 shares on Slack this month:

Let’s go out for carrots sometime.

99 shares on TikTok this month:

Twitter sucks so much, but randomly there are such funny tweets, so I wait, like a frog, for one delicious fly.

30 shares on TikTok this month:

Definitely thought I’d be solving mysteries and unmasking ghosts in a van with a dog by this point in my life.

66 shares on LinkedIn this month:

One thing no one mentions about being an adult is how much time you debate with yourself over keeping a cardboard box because it’s a really good box.

97 shares on Discord this month:

Feeling like Floyd in this May weather (illiterate and violent).

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I just want a man to look at me the way Doc from ‘Back to the Future’ looks when something exciting happens.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t question my wife’s choices because I’m one of them.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

My mind is like my web browser. 19 tabs are open, 3 are frozen and I have no idea where the music is coming from.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t think humans were put on this earth to know what Salesforce is. It’s unnatural.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I have no issue with people talking in the morning. But not with me, please!

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I can’t wait until my kids have a place of their own so I can come barging through their door and say “what’s for dinner? I don’t like that. Can you give me money for McDonald’s?”

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes people come into your life — and they need to stop doing that.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I look stable, but I talk to animals, and wait for them to reply.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The secret to a clean home? Never let your husband or children in.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

No open job postings for “Warrior Poet” found in your area. Please try another search.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,306

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

I love putting on warm underwear fresh out of the dryer. Plus, it’s fun to look around the laundromat and guess who they belong to.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

Not only is it not Friday, it’s not even Thursday.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

I be skipping everyone’s stories but watch mine like 20 times.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

I’m not your dream woman. I am the sudden shouting of ravens that you hear when you enter a part of the forest you shouldn’t have.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

The older I get, the more I lose my looks. But I’m also losing my eyesight, so it’s not my problem.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

Roadtripping with my family has taught me that my marriage can withstand anything except roadtripping with my family.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

You know you’re getting old when you and the grocery store have the same playlist.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

Gentle parenting is making sure your kids can’t hear what you say when you’re peeling a mango.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

“Some men go months without being hugged.” Okay, then they should just hug each other.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

Don’t let anyone tell you, you can’t do something. Show them you can’t.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Twitch:

Just know that somebody out there is thinking of you, and you should really lock your doors.

Just shared via Messenger:

Nobody is doing it like me because this is probably not the right way to do it.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Nothing says, “I love you,” like an echo chamber.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

It’s actually scary how your whole life depends on how well you did as a teenager.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Wanna know a real adult life hack? Don’t tell anyone when you have a day off. Absolutely no one.

Trending via TikTok:

For Valentine’s Day, I’m gift-wrapping a shirt my husband hasn’t worn in years. It’s the thought that counts—and technically, I thought of it twice.

Going viral on Discord:

Deodorant? No, I never need to buy any. People just give it to me. Complete strangers sometimes.

Just landed via Threads:

Wooden pews are designed to maximize the shame of farting in church.

Shared recently on X:

My middle finger salutes you.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Runners who smoke need to pick a side.

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