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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

You should get one IG story in addition to your one phone call when you’re arrested.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

I’m so old, I still keep special moments in my heart and not in my Insta story.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

Replying to all emails with “ya think?”.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

I’m not saying I’m messy, but if Copperfield knew what I can make disappear, he’d be jealous.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

The next time someone texts me “we need to talk,” I’ll reply, “Yes, we really need to talk,” so that I won’t be the only one stressing.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

Please twerk; I have just days left.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

My boyfriend talks to everyone while I stand by quietly, planning my escape.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

You relax for 15 minutes after work, and next thing you know, it’s 10 p.m.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

Gang initiations from the Midwest be like “you have to eat the entire potato salad.”

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

Sometimes being a woman is just trying to figure out if you’re hormonally sad, seasonally sad, or genuinely falling apart.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

219 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,488

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,488

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,573

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Telegram:

I may regret the megabytes I’ve wasted, but I’ll never regret the megabites I’ve tasted.

Making waves on WeChat:

Anyone who doesn’t like me snoring, doesn’t deserve me moaning either.

Going bananas on WeChat:

“Lmao” has survived and even thrived over the years, but its cousin “rofl” has faded into indignity. The cruelty of fate.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

The thief who stole my iPhone could face time.

Just landed via Instagram:

Friendly reminder that someone having a different opinion about a movie than you is a direct attack on you as a person and you should take it very personally.

Just shared via TikTok:

So, technically, Moses is the first man to download files from the cloud using a tablet.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

I remember when a computer didn’t automatically connect to the internet, it used to make a screaming noise. We should have listened.

Going viral on Instagram:

If I would’ve known that you were going to ask me what I was thinking, I wouldn’t have been thinking what I was thinking.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Just found out my 84-year-old neighbour is on his own tomorrow, so I’ve just been over to collect his spare chairs to borrow.

Broadcasted on Threads:

My teen being nice to me is getting really expensive.

Funny dandelion quotes

Funny dandelion quotes 🌼💨 bring a burst of laughter to those pesky little weeds we love to hate! These cheeky sayings celebrate the wild charm of dandelions, turning everyday nuisances into moments of joy and wit. Ready to see dandelions in a whole new light? Let’s blow away the gloom and sprinkle some humor into your day! 😂✨

New funny dandelion quotes 👇

All funny dandelion quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

52 shares on Discord this month:

Can the AI bubble just pop already? Everyone hates this crap.

92 shares on Discord this month:

What beautiful weather outside. I’m gonna close the curtains.

65 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I may have bags under my eyes, but they’re Versace.

79 shares on Slack this month:

I march to the beat of my own dumb.

61 shares on Facebook this month:

If I honk at this person, maybe it will make them a better person.

91 shares on WeChat this month:

To all of you who have never tried blindfold archery: You don’t know what you’re missing!

92 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m a private person except for when I’m publicly trauma dumping on social media.

96 shares on Snapchat this month:

Met a microbiologist once. They’re a lot bigger than I imagined.

43 shares on Messenger this month:

I appreciate the interest, but I’m officially removing myself from the running to be the next James Bond. Thank you for your understanding.

95 shares on Pinterest this month:

Don’t be sad, laundry, nobody’s doing me either.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

My life goal is to make you feel as awkward or awesome as you are making me feel.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

My friends have canceled our dinner plans two nights in a row. I’m starting to think they don’t like dinner.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

How do they know an animal is extinct? Like, have you really looked everywhere?

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Village life is when you send two kids out to play and six kids come back hungry.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t get vegetables on my pizza because I don’t like mixing business with pleasure.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

The words I can’t wait to hear someday, “I’m sorry, Mom, you were right about everything.”

9 folks are currently checking 👀

“Easy like Sunday morning” is something people with no kids say.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Cheating on an exam by memorizing all the content beforehand so I can easily answer the questions.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

If you can’t tell which family member is coming up the stairs by the speed and weight of their footsteps, are you even family?

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I’d like to have a word with the groundhog before he starts working this year.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

219 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,488

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,488

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,562

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Let’s call it a year. I’ve had enough. Merry Christmas, y’all.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

Meow means woof in cat.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

I’m glad laughter is the best medicine because my insurance sucks.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

A blind guy felt my face and said, “Wonderful.”

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

There’s a word in modern Hungarian slang, egérmozi, which describes watching films (or shows) on your phone. It means “mouse cinema”.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

Forget my browser history, when I finally pass from this earth, please delete my calculator history because it’s way more embarrassing.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

The biggest first-world problem is having your favorite makeup product be discontinued.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

5pm on a Friday: call me a McDonald’s ice-cream machine because I’m not working.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

Not sure who needs to hear this, but make your bloody bed.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

Washing your face and water going down your elbow is so sickening.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WhatsApp:

Gonna break into your house, toast all your bread and put it back in the bag.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I’m sorry, being on social media gave you the impression I’m a social person.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Just told my cat I’d give her 500 bucks to stop meowing.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I’m at the age where the first thing I do when I get somewhere is look for a place to sit.

Just shared via Facebook:

Is there a bravery award I can nominate my son for as he managed to eat his toast despite the fact I cut it wrong.

Just landed via WeChat:

You got a better chance getting chased by a dog than by me.

Going viral on TikTok:

Just blocked all the ugly people, so if you see this… what’s up, big sexy?

Just landed via YouTube:

I miss when The Weeknd made haunted strip club music. Didn’t know how good I had it.

Broadcasted on X:

There’s some gifs that I’ve started to act out in real life as responses to situations.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

I don’t have kids or a dog. What can I bring into a bar that will make everyone mad?

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