Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

When someone tells me “They could care less”, instead of the proper “I couldn’t care less”, I always say “At least you care.”

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

It would be nice to see basic human decency make a comeback.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

Just so you know, what you now call an energy bar is what my father gave the canary.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

With all the fake information out there, I refuse to believe scales or mirrors.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

An evil genius rising to a position of power is bad but it makes sense at least. Feels insulting we’re constantly seeing evil idiots doing it instead.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

There are a 100 billions nerves in the human body, and there are people who have the ability to irritate all of them.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

Seems like paleontologists always have a bone to pick.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

Has anyone else noticed that it’s hard to do things when you don’t want to?

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

Went fishing and actually caught a fish. So now I gotta deal with this shit.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

I set up a Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,486

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on TikTok:

People often mistake me for an adult because of my age.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Somewhere, a therapist you never met knows about you.

Making waves on Twitch:

I run a parody bank account.

Trending via X:

Things were better when the computer lived in its own specific room, and you only went in there sometimes.

Spotted on Instagram:

I asked my boyfriend if he believed in trolls and elves and he said, “slightly.”

Seen just now on Slack:

Fifteen years ago, makeup was all powders and dusts. But now, it’s all goo and liquid. From this, I can infer that by 2040, it will all be made of pigmented gases.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Sorry for running at you on all fours, I was excited to see you.

Going viral on Snapchat:

“How am I supposed to avoid Al when I’ve procrastinated on a paper?” With a night full of caffeine and nicotine like your forefathers, you babies.

Just landed via Threads:

Sorry, I can’t hang out. I don’t know enough words.

Making waves on YouTube:

Me (seductively looking at a potato): would mash.

294 Funny everyone quotes

Funny everyone quotes poke fun at the universal truths and shared experiences that *everyone* can relate to — whether we admit it or not! 😂🌍 From pretending to know what we’re doing to acting cool while tripping over nothing, these quotes remind us that everyone has their awkward, silly moments. Because if everyone’s doing it, it’s probably hilarious! 😆🙋‍♀️📣

New funny everyone quotes 👇

Good morning to everyone who still believes what they see with their own two eyes.

7 days ago

belief, everyone, eye, eyes, good, good morning, humor, morning, own, perception, reality, sarcasm, sight, still
I liked it better when I was naive enough to think everyone was empathetic.

7 days ago

better, disillusionment, empathy, enough, everyone, human, human nature, humor, i, irony, liked, naive, nature, think
Doc, if I can vibecode anything and everyone else can vibecode anything, then what’s my competitive advantage?

7 days ago

advantage, anything, coding, competition, competitive, competitive advantage, Doc, doctor, else, everyone, humor, i, question, technology, vibecode
From a very young age, I knew that everyone was wrong and I was right.

7 days ago

age, arrogance, childhood, confidence, everyone, humor, i, opinion, perspective, right, self-awareness, truth, wrong, young
Guy on the day of the 1918 armistice, walking around the trench, clapping, saying things like “Great work, everyone,” and “We did it, team.”

7 days ago

1918, armistice, around, celebration, clapping, day, everyone, great, guy, humor, saying, soldier, team, teamwork, things, trench, victory, walking, war, work
Sometimes, when you go with the flow you end up drowning with everyone else.

1 week ago

advice, crowd, drowning, else, end, everyone, flow, humor, irony, metaphor, sometimes
You’re still ragebaiting? Everyone is on vagueposting now. Keep up.

1 week ago

behavior, communication, communication style, everyone, humor, internet, internet slang, keep, media, online, online behavior, ragebait, ragebaiting, slang, social, social media, still, style, vaguepost
The real pandemic was when everyone was reading The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck.

1 week ago

art, book, distraction, everyone, f*ck, giving, humor, pandemic, quarantine, reading, real, satire, self-help, subtle, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck
Being a writer means having a story you want everyone in the world to read, except anyone who knows you.

1 week ago

anyone, awkwardness, being, everyone, except, having, humor, irony, knows, life, means, read, reader, social, social awkwardness, story, want, world, writer, writing, writing life
It’s funny how everyone who was all about Christmas a week ago is suddenly into New Year’s now.

1 week ago

ago, celebration, change, Christmas, everyone, Funny, holiday, humor, new, new year, seasonal, seasonal change, timing, tradition, week, year

For even more funny everyone quotes, hit next 👇

All funny everyone quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

55 shares on Slack this month:

If small talk burned calories, maybe I’d consider it.

37 shares on Messenger this month:

My favorite kind of gender reveal is the one where the parents find out, and they just tell everyone through text instead of making me go to a party.

30 shares on WeChat this month:

According to your ex, what’s exactly wrong with you?

97 shares on Discord this month:

A wise man once said, “Bees don’t waste their time explaining to flies that honey is better than shit.”

88 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My red flag is that I don’t make playlists on Spotify. I just add every song I’ve ever liked to the ‘Liked Songs’ playlist and shuffle that, like an iPod.

36 shares on Instagram this month:

That moment when you have to restart a song because the conversations in your head got too loud and you missed half the song.

58 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Confession: If you’ve ever been in a revolving door with me, I was only pretending to push.

54 shares on Facebook this month:

When I was a kid, I never expected the future to suck this much.

45 shares on WhatsApp this month:

A guy waited exactly 3 days to text me. Someone’s been studying the ancient scrolls of 1980s dating advice.

36 shares on Slack this month:

Men used to send love letters in the middle of wars, and now they think reassurance is too much effort.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Be the funny, awkward silence breaker you want to see in the world.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate when I get ready too quickly and have to sit on the couch, fully dressed, and wait like an idiot.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not feeling very worky today.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Thank God I have a cat. Who else is gonna shit in this box I have?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Going to the beach as a feet guy must be insane.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

When planning dinner, remember that ice-cream has both calcium and protein.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

(to the boys in the yard) I hope you brought your own milkshake.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

It ain’t easy being America’s sweetheart during these dark times, but someone gotta do it!

19 folks are currently checking 👀

My kid asked me if I’ve ever experienced hallucinations, which is an odd thing to ask considering I don’t have any kids.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

If oats can be milk, you can be whatever you want.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,303

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

Whitening my teeth by getting a tan.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

Overthinking should at least burn calories.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

There hasn’t been a single person in human history that was remembered for spending their life working a 9-5 job.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

One of the most amazing things in nature is that the basketball hoop is the perfect size to fit a basketball through.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

They should invent a day where I feel normal.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

Girl dinner, but it’s the hearts of men who wouldn’t take ‘no’ for an answer.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

Fun fact: sexual tension is more fun than the sex itself.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

It’s strange that we say time is a great healer when it kills 100% of people.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

Honestly, shopping beats therapy, anytime. It costs the same and you get a dress out of it.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

I remember sex. That was cool.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on TikTok:

Gonna finish eating all these Christmas cookies so I’m no longer tempted to eat them.

Spotted on YouTube:

You don’t know your own leg strength until you’re kicking the end of a hotel tucked bed sheet.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

According to a study, people believe anything that starts with ‘according to a study’.

Trending via Reddit:

Worst part about job hunting is knowing you don’t want one.

Just shared via Slack:

I enjoy a glass of wine each night for its health benefits. The other glasses are for my witty comebacks and flawless dance moves.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Old people are right about crosswords and morning stretches, I will admit.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Next time I feel butterflies, I’m chugging down a bottle of tequila so they drown.

Making waves on Pinterest:

My big 3? Yapping, napping & snacking!

Spotted on YouTube:

Should I be worried that buzzards circle me when I go for a run?

Spotted on Facebook:

Trying to decide what to burn for dinner, so I can order pizza.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴