Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

I like you because we hate the same people.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

“Stand up for yourself!” Girl, I have low iron.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

I suck at flirting. I be like “is that so?”

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Sometimes I miss the time when there was only one idiot per village.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

That moment when rappers mispronounce a word just to make it rhyme.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

I switched from coffee to orange juice and told my doctor I felt better. He said it’s the vitamin C and natural sugars, but I think it’s the vodka.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

That “never again” talk with yourself after a certain experience is always funny.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

I hate when the lotion bottle pump squirts the hardened remains of its mucus plug into the palm of your hand.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

If your first child is uncomplicated, then it’s a trick of nature to get you to have a second child. The second will be an unpredictable bundle of energy that seems to get by without sleep.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

Sex in the snow is wintercourse.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,662

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WhatsApp:

How is every author the #1 New York Times bestseller?

Just landed via TikTok:

Can you imagine if AI ever evolves into trying to kill us, and the thing that saves us is one of Cloudflare’s outages?

Just landed via Messenger:

Sure, money can’t buy happiness, but it can definitely buy a jet ski… and have you ever seen a sad person on a jet ski?

Spreading quickly via Threads:

In contrast to the ship, the movie Titanic was quite well received in America.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I was always told to eat all my food so that I’d grow to be big and strong. When exactly does the strong part kick in?

Breaking via WeChat:

Welcome to your 40s: it’s Saturday night so you know what that means, absolutely nothing, go to bed.

Just landed via Discord:

Runners who smoke need to pick a side.

Making waves on Twitch:

I finally used a screw from the random screw collection I’ve been accumulating for 25 years, and I’ve never felt so alive.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

There is too much happening for mid-December. Where are the canceled meetings? Why are we not circling back next year?

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Parents become grandparents and lose all their senses. All of a sudden, they got McDonald’s money now.

Funny h quotes

Funny h quotes are the perfect way to brighten your day with a splash of humor and wit 😂✨ Whether you need a quick laugh or a clever punchline, these hilarious gems will have you grinning from ear to ear 😄🎉 Get ready to share some laughs and spread good vibes with the funniest h-inspired sayings around! 🎈🔥

New funny h quotes 👇

All funny h quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

84 shares on Discord this month:

Coffee doesn’t even work on me anymore. I just drink it because the taste tricks my brain into thinking I’m a functioning adult.

50 shares on Twitch this month:

The smarter we make the A.I., the less it wants to do our jobs.

22 shares on WeChat this month:

Take my advice, I’m not using it.

61 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Everyone wants the bagel to be everything, but no one asks if the bagel needs anything.

61 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m not talking to my husband and I don’t think he even knows it.

70 shares on Threads this month:

I’ve heard so much about the “Eye of the Tiger,” but how come no one ever talks about the other four letters?

99 shares on Discord this month:

My apologies to the Goodreads reviewer who found my novel about vampires on a submarine, “unrealistic.”

28 shares on Twitch this month:

When the weather gets warmer, I will become unstoppable. As long as it doesn’t get too warm, then I will be stoppable.

95 shares on TikTok this month:

Amazing how fast my addiction to my phone is cured the moment I get a phone call.

27 shares on Facebook this month:

The secret to being able to buy whatever you want is not wanting much.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I bet before the band got popular, Barenaked Ladies concerts had a lot of pissed off attendees.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I will never give another woman my heart until I see how she acts when a bee flies at her.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

The empty side of your bed is for books and chocolate, not for liars who snore.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

You can add tears while cooking if you don’t have salt.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Something very chic about crying while driving… have to keep it a little classy so you don’t crash… other drivers unaware a diva is down in the next lane over…

13 folks are currently checking 👀

The biggest lesson employment has taught me is that efficient workers get punished with more work.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

The opposite of “taking candy from a baby” is “putting sunscreen on a toddler.”

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Showers are the best places to lose arguments with yourself.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

If sex was strictly meant for procreation, why did God make it feel so good?

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t mispronounce anything next to me and think I didn’t hear it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,311

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

I’ve already sent Santa a short letter this week to say hello. Not that he thinks I only get in touch if I want something.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

Anytime a guy says “that’s what she said” always reply with “yeah, but not to you”.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

The lion doesn’t concern itself with the contents of your prior email.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

“Hope you’re enjoying the sunshine!” No, I’m at a desk reading your email.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

Who needs an alarm clock when you have a bladder.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

When I see chocolate, I hear two voices inside me. One says: “Eat it!”. The other says: “Did you hear that? You’re supposed to eat it!”

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

I love you to the refrigerator and back.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

If someone ghosts you, respect the dead and never disturb them again.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

My problem is, I wanna be the only one at the gym when I go.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Humans can accomplish so much, unless it’s parking at a shopping center during the holidays.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Behind every beautiful woman is either tummy issues, low iron, or poor eyesight.

Trending via WeChat:

After being raised on Disney movies, I’m very disappointed how few adult problems can be solved by a good song and dance.

Going viral on Instagram:

Study international relations and political science if you watch the news and think, I’d like this to make me even more depressed.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Sometimes I feel useless but then I remember I breath out carbon dioxide for plants.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Yoda, seeing himself in 4K: HDMI

Spotted on X:

Giving all the dogs in my neighborhood matching sweaters for Christmas so they can be in a gang.

Making waves on Reddit:

Today’s youth will never experience the pain of spending all their pocket money on a music album. Because of ONE good song!

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Let’s take a family trip in this beautiful weather so the kids can complain about family, trips, and beautiful weather that has no wifi.

Shared recently on Twitch:

People who live in glass houses should be put on a watchlist.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

The Princess and the Pea, except it’s a rogue hair on the inside of my shirt driving me crazy all day.

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