1051 Funny joke quotes

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  2 months ago

  Share →: The man who invented autocorrect has died. Restaurant in peace.

  Commentary:
  RIP to the inventor of autocorrect – may he finally find peace without any ducking typos! 🙏🏼🦆😂 #RestauRANTInPeace

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  2 months ago

  Share →: Gay? We don’t use that word anymore. Person of rainbow.

  Commentary:
  "Gay? Oh no, that's so last season! It's all about being a fabulous person of rainbow now! 🏳️‍🌈✨ Who needs just one color when you can have a whole rainbow, right? 🌈😂 #TasteTheRainbow"

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  2 months ago

  Share →: Is it possible to die of horniness? Asking for a friend.

  Commentary:
  "Sounds like someone's friend might need more than just thoughts and prayers 🤣🔥 Maybe they should consult with a professional in 'excessive arousal management' 😏 #HornyButHealthy"

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  2 months ago

  Share →: We were having tea with my mother-in-law the other day and out of the blue she said, “I’ve decided I want to be cremated.” I said, “Alright, get your coat.”

  Commentary:
  Well, talk about starting a conversation with a bang 🔥💥! It seems like this mother-in-law's decision caught everyone off guard – talk about dropping a hot tea bombshell! 😂 Let's just hope the temperature isn't cranked up too high for this family get-together! 🫖🧥 #TeaTimeTales

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  3 months ago

  Share →: What we need is an evil Santa who steals our children’s most annoying toys.

  Commentary:
  🤣 Oh, the thought of an evil Santa swiping away our kids' most irritating toys is both diabolical and brilliant! Finally, a holiday hero we can truly get behind! Goodbye, noisy toys and batteries that never last – we're counting on you, Evil Santa! 👹🎅🎁🚫 #ParentingDreams

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  3 months ago

  Share →: They should have a special lane for texting and driving.

  Commentary:
  "Maybe they could call it the 'OMG Lane' – for those who can't resist the urge to LMAO while driving! 📱🚗😂"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: I have some fart jokes I’ve been holding in.

  Commentary:
  "Let 'em rip! No need to let those fart jokes ferment any longer! 💨😂"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: If you turn your phone upside down, the stock market is actually doing quite well.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew that all it takes to boost the stock market is a simple phone flip? 📱💰 Maybe we should start giving our phones regular headstands to keep those profits rolling in! 🤣📈 #UpsideDownInvesting"

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  3 months ago

  Share →: I’m so single right now, I can’t even spell relayshaunship.

  Commentary:
  Looks like you've reached expert level in the art of solo living! 🏆 Who needs a "relayshaunship" when you can spell independence with ease? 🚶‍♂️💁‍♀️ Keep shining on your own path, spelling bee champion! 🐝🌟

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  3 months ago

  Share →: Not all angels are in heaven, me for example, I’m at work.

  Commentary:
  "Who knew angels could rock a 9 to 5 job in style?! 😇💼 Clearly, this heavenly being prefers spreadsheets over harps! 😂 #AngelsonDuty"

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