Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

Don’t fall for me — I’ll treat you right, and you’ll get bored and cheat.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

Due to unforeskin circumcistances …

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

What are cats even trying to do?

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

Not to brag, but I ate all of my bananas before they turned brown. Don’t be jealous.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

Willem Dafoe gets to be in two different Nosferatu movies, whereas the average person doesn’t even get to be in one.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

I mostly choose to stay silent in weird situations but my face has subtitles.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

Who are these people that buy unsalted butter on purpose?

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

You get what you pay for. Unless the delivery man leaves it on your doorstep. Then the fastest person on your street gets what you paid for.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

What’s wrong with the people who come to visit on Sundays? Don’t they have a couch?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

46 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,315

Funny Quotes Topics

17,438

Funny Quotes Images

15,315

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,528

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Facebook:

Of course, my summer body is ready; it’s the same as my winter body but sweatier.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Reminder that you need to be scrolling all day to monitor the situation.

Just landed via X:

I like to describe the difference between theory and practice with shopping lists and receipts.

Trending via TikTok:

You befriend a guy and a few days later he’s like “I wanna talk to you about something”. Please, God, let it be about the economy.

Freshly posted on X:

Fun fact: The US was originally not meant to be a reality TV show.

Trending via X:

My friends put their kid to bed and then made us ice cream sundaes, which is exactly what I assumed was happening when my parents put me to bed.

Making waves on Telegram:

It should be illegal to take a nap and still have a headache when you wake up. Like, no, I shut it off and back on again. Why are you still here?

Trending via WeChat:

Twitter needs a button that’s “bring back that tweet I was just starting to read before you automatically refreshed.”

Just landed via Discord:

I can be social. Today I meowed at my cat and he meowed back.

Going bananas on YouTube:

Caught the bouquet at the funeral.

Funny paranormal quotes

Funny paranormal quotes 👻 bring a playful twist to spooky stories, turning chills into chuckles! Whether you’re team ghost hunter or just love a good laugh with the supernatural 👀, these witty sayings add a lighthearted spin to eerie encounters. Perfect for sharing at Halloween 🎃 or anytime you want to mix mystery with humor. Get ready to giggle through the ghostly vibes! 😄✨

New funny paranormal quotes 👇

All funny paranormal quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

27 shares on Discord this month:

That one person who has zero concept of what an indoor voice is.

72 shares on Reddit this month:

Apartments show you 44 pics of the lobby. Man, I ain’t living in there.

39 shares on Threads this month:

They should invent a Sunday that’s longer than a couple of minutes.

40 shares on Threads this month:

My parents think they know me.

18 shares on WeChat this month:

In the 80s, if you woke up feeling thirsty, you could drink some of your waterbed.

79 shares on Discord this month:

It’s not the destination that matters. It’s the snacks you eat on the way.

56 shares on Twitch this month:

That awkward moment when someone you hate is breathing.

56 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If I had known how much care balcony plants need, I could have stopped taking the pill.

37 shares on WeChat this month:

Need to clean the fridge, so I’m going to do the responsible thing and drink wine instead.

60 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I really wish people would stop thinking they need to speak to me in the mornings.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Dracula had it right, sleep all day, live alone in a castle and explode into a thousand bats to get out of social situations.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Forget Spotify Wrapped. How many minutes did you spend listening to your girlfriend this year?

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Nobody can ragebait as successfully as your own mother can.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Optimist: The glass is ½ full. Pessimist: The glass is ½ empty. Excel: The glass is January 2nd.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve discovered I have a logic fetish, I just can’t stop coming to conclusions.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

My rapper name would be 2 stressd.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

The quality of clothing at retail stores today is quite literally the quality that Halloween costumes used to be.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Life’s all about crossroads and intersections; unfortunately, I’m a bad driver.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

If I found E.T., I would’ve developed his jump shot.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

46 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,315

Funny Quotes Topics

17,438

Funny Quotes Images

15,315

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,369

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

I’m so bored, I’m gonna join a poly-relationship and stage a coup and kick the main one out.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can’t it get us out?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

If the earth was flat, cats would have pushed everything off it by now.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

Do you all introverts ever open a text and think, ‘I’ll reply when I have the energy,’ and then it’s three weeks, and you have to live with the guilt of being a horrible friend.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

Jesus turned water into wine. I turn food into fertilizer. We are not the same.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

Last night’s dream could have been an email.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

I don’t think either person should pay for the first date. It should be on the house.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has shared:

Maybe if we paid our streaming services even more, they could stop jacking up the volume on the commercials they make us watch, even though we are paying for the service.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

There’s a reason you ain’t ever used your phone in a dream.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Authenticity is whispered, but bullshit is broadcasted.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Reddit:

I’ve never met a cake I didn’t want to fork.

Shared recently on X:

Love those deep burps that instantly make me feel like I lost 10 lbs.

Shared recently on Reddit:

My security system is just a bunch of my unpaid bills taped to my front door.

Spotted on Instagram:

Fancy restaurants are self-esteem destroyers because good luck not leaving an embarrassing stain on the white table cloth. Ever.

Shared recently on Messenger:

A middle finger hits different when your nails are done.

Trending via Pinterest:

When you’re dead, you don’t know that you’re dead. But it’s hard for those around you. It’s the same when you’re stupid.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Social media needs to crash for like a year so society can recalibrate.

Breaking via TikTok:

Laying in a hammock is essentially saying, “I hope there are no emergencies.”

Going viral on Messenger:

If you have any questions or concerns please don’t. Hesitate to ask.

Just landed via Messenger:

I took the road less traveled. Where am I?

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