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5 months ago
Share →: My age is news to me every single time I remember.

Commentary:
🤔💭 *Age: the only number that can surprise you on a regular basis!* 😜🎉
5 months ago
Share →: That very depressing moment when you find out the fire alarm that went off at work was just a test.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'excitement vs disappointment' rollercoaster ride at the workplace! 🔥🔕 Don't worry, next time the real fire might bring some action… or maybe just burn the office snacks 🍿🔥 #FalseAlarmBlues"
5 months ago
Share →: I was dismayed to hear the story of Rumpelstiltskin. I had no idea he was like that outside of work.

Commentary:
"Oh, Rumpelstiltskin really knows how to keep his true self under wraps! 🙈 Who knew he had a whole other side hustle going on? 😂 Watch out for those fairy tale characters, they've got some surprising secrets up their sleeves!"
5 months ago
Share →: I can’t believe the gall of this bladder.

Commentary:
Well, well, well, looks like someone's bladder is making bold moves today! 😄👀 Who knew bladders had so much attitude? Watch out world, we've got a sassy organ on the loose! 🕺💁‍♂️
5 months ago
Share →: No, I mean, it’s great toast. I just didn’t expect it to be French.

Commentary:
"Oh là là, even the toast is feeling fancy today! 🇫🇷 Who knew toast could have such an elegant identity crisis? 😂 Maybe it's time to start a toast revolution! Vive la toast française! 🥖✨"
5 months ago
Share →: My lawyer dropped his briefcase and nunchuks fell out.

Commentary:
Well, it looks like they take "fighting for justice" quite literally in that court! 🥋💼 Hope they don't confuse the legal briefs with ninja strikes! Just imagine a dramatic courtroom scene: "Objection, Your Honor! *nunchucks move.*" 😂 #LegalNinja
5 months ago
Share →: Always be kind. You never know who might own a jacuzzi.

Commentary:
"Remember folks, kindness pays off! 🌟 You never know when your good deed might lead to a VIP dip in a jacuzzi! 💦 So, spread those good vibes and keep your eyes peeled for the next potential jacuzzi owner! 🛁😄 #KindnessIsKey"
5 months ago
Share →: I don’t know how to explain it, but sometimes cheese just falls into my cart at the grocery store.

Commentary:
"Cheese: the master of stealth in the grocery store aisles, always finding a whey into your cart 🧀🛒 Just blame it on the dairy fairy, right? 😉"
5 months ago
Share →: Most venomous snakes just make “Tsssss”. But I know some that say “Hi”.

Commentary:
Looks like those snakes have been practicing their social skills 🐍👋 Who knew they were such chatty reptiles? Maybe they just need a friend to slither around with! #SnakeTalks #SocialSerpents
5 months ago
Share →: Until I open the wrapper and look inside it’s Schrödinger’s Kit Kat.

Commentary:
"Is it a complete Kit Kat bar, or a pocketful of crumbs? 🍫🔍 Schrödinger's Kit Kat: the suspense is just a delicious way of keeping us on our toes! 😂"