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I wish companies would use pictures of models looking frazzled and exhausted on their websites, so I can get a real idea of what their clothes will look like on me.
Jan 18, 2025
If you start liking someone, just block them. Follow me for more relationship advice.
Jan 18, 2025
I hate that moment when you are tired and sleepy but as soon as you go to bed your body is like "just kidding."
Jan 18, 2025
Glory hole but for forehead kisses.
Jan 18, 2025
It may sound crazy but some of us are nice without hidden agendas.
Jan 18, 2025
You want fast replies from a female? Argue with her!
Jan 18, 2025
Deleting tweets like a writer who burns his manuscripts.
Jan 18, 2025
TV lead me to believe grave digging would be a lot easier.
Jan 18, 2025
People will make you sad but cheese will always make you happy. The choice is simple.
Jan 18, 2025
A sandwich has the power to change your entire life.
Jan 18, 2025