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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

Getting tired without doing anything is an art form.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

I can’t even think straight knowing a package got delivered while I’m not home.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

Wearing expensive perfume to work feels like such a waste. This should be under someone’s full body weight, not in a corporate setting.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

Just remembered why I went upstairs yesterday.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

Let the good times roll. Let the bad times crawl. Let the acceptable times do the hopscotch.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

Today feels like a good day for a cheeseburger.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

Good luck sending me mixed signals. Most the time I can’t even understand the direct ones.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Manipulative birthday text to an ex idea: thank you for loving me briefly in the way that only you could.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

What’s said in the blanket fort, stays in the blanket fort.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

Wanna go back to my place and meow at each other?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Jan 20, 2026

3,473

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Discord:

Elections make you feel like we’re all in divorce court waiting to see who gets custody of us.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Before I start seeing a psychiatrist, does anyone like me crazy?

Broadcasted on Discord:

I just can’t watch football, there’s too much “penetration in the backfield” for me to not giggle like an immature maniac.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

What wine pairs well with the kids being stuck inside during a heat wave?

Spotted on Slack:

I’m so desperate for a vacation that at this point I’d spend an all inclusive week at Jurassic Park.

Making waves on YouTube:

“We told you to stop at 2012!” – The Mayans

Spotted on Messenger:

No, babe, I love your prefrontal cortex. The fully developed ones scare me.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

At the end of the day, it’s the friend that doesn’t take your ghosting phases personally.

Going viral on Discord:

My life changed when I learned some house spiders can’t survive outside, so now I just catch them and release them in a friend’s home.

Just shared via Facebook:

Stop eating cakes with the fakes and come eat a bundt with a cundt.

111 Funny adulthood quotes

Funny adulthood quotes poke fun at the wild ride that is “growing up” — and how no one really knows what they’re doing! 😂🧾 Whether it’s getting excited about new sponges, budgeting like a boss (and failing), or realizing naps are the highlight of your weekend, these quotes remind us that adulthood is less “put together” and more “winging it with snacks.” Because being an adult is just pretending you’re not tired… all the time! 😆💼☕

New funny adulthood quotes 👇

You know you’re mature when you go to the dentist and you are no longer afraid of pain, but of how much it costs.

38 minutes ago

adulthood, cost, dental, dental visit, dentist, expenses, fear, humor, know, mature, maturity, pain, visit
Once you start paying rent, every joke stops being funny.

47 minutes ago

adulthood, being, bills, change, expenses, humor, joke, life, life change, rent, responsibility, start
You know you’re getting old when you clean the house to the music you used to go out to.

3 hours ago

adulthood, age, clean, cleaning, getting, getting old, house, housework, music, nostalgia, old, used
Can’t believe, as a kid, I thought 21-year-olds had their lives figured out.

7 hours ago

adulthood, age, believe, childhood, expectation, humor, i, kid, life, realization, reflection, thought
Why is adulthood just bills and wondering what to eat?

7 hours ago

adulthood, bill, bills, decision, eat, food, humor, just, responsibility, why, wondering
I’m really getting tired of being a responsible adult.

8 hours ago

adult, adulthood, being, frustration, getting, humor, life, responsibility, responsible, tired
Adulthood – a never-ending story of shit you have to do.

12 hours ago

adulthood, adulting, chore, humor, life, neverending, responsibility, shit, story
The worst thing about being an adult is that you have to be one every single day.

12 hours ago

adult, adulthood, being, daily, daily life, day, every, humor, life, responsibility, single, struggle, thing, worst
It sucks that the reward for being responsible, is just a bunch of new responsibilities.

15 hours ago

adulthood, being, humor, irony, just, lesson, life, life lesson, new, responsibility, responsible, reward, sucks
Worst part of being in my 20’s is to be reminded that I’m actually in my mid-40’s.

22 hours ago

20s, actually, adulthood, age, aging, being, crisis, humor, identity, identity crisis, life, life stage, mid-40s, stage, worst

For even more funny adulthood quotes, hit next 👇

All funny adulthood quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

27 shares on Snapchat this month:

Post beach shower is undefeated. Greatest feeling a human could experience. Throw a nap in there, and you will never touch serenity so close.

68 shares on TikTok this month:

If my trainee says “oh God” one more time, he’s going to meet him.

84 shares on Pinterest this month:

Germany is now advising people to stock up on cheese and sausages. This is called the Wurst Käse scenario.

91 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m so single, even my husband won’t match with me on Tinder.

91 shares on Messenger this month:

My boyfriend moved in with me straight from Hotel Mama. In a way, I’m now a single parent.

29 shares on Instagram this month:

Killing with kindness is a murder by compliments.

74 shares on Reddit this month:

The amount of water you actually need to drink to be hydrated is so obscene. Who does this body think it is? A data center?

93 shares on YouTube this month:

Have you ever been sitting around overthinking about overthinking, and then wonder why you’re even thinking that?

17 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Surely, this is the hangover that will teach me my lesson.

54 shares on YouTube this month:

We’re all in the billionaire submarine now.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I do believe TikTok saves the funniest videos for late at night. There’s no way.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Whoever said money can’t buy happiness simply didn’t know where to go shopping.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

This can’t be the same body that used to be able to stay up all night.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

The only thing I miss from my past is that flat stomach I had.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

So deep in her Instagram story, I accidentally liked an ad for a Toyota.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Freddie Mercury, Venus Williams, and Bruno Mars walk into a bar. They didn’t planet that way.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

If I ask “What’s your zodiac sign?” it’s either because we’re vibing or you’re getting on my nerves.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Sausage might clog my arteries, but it lubricates my soul.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate it when I’m at work and someone asks “are you at free at the moment?”. Please expand further so I can know if I’m free or not.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Being an adult is a little out of my price range right now.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,582

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

There’s nothing worse than being in public and you touch something that shouldn’t be sticky and it is.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

How do I get my glasses prescription placed in my windshield?

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

The only appointment I’m ever on time for is disappointment.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

If you can’t laugh at yourself, I will.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

If you shouldn’t go food shopping when you’re hungry, then you should definitely not go clothes shopping when you’re naked. Trust me on this.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

Being single for Valentine’s Day is way better than being in the wrong relationship.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

To anybody who thinks being self-employed means you don’t have to work for a boss you hate, I have terrible news.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

I used to mix Mountain Dew with the cheapest vodka I could find, and I called it the Blood of Mannaroth because it’s green and turns you into an orc.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

Sorry I’m late. I was scraping the clearance tag off your Christmas present.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

Happy Earth Day. You don’t look a day over 4 billion years and get hotter every year.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Messenger:

If I’m ever the problem, you’re the reason.

Just shared via Reddit:

I hate it when I do the math about where my money went, and it all adds up. No one robbed me; I didn’t lose it. It was really all me.

Just landed via WeChat:

Okay, new plan, I’m going to marry a Kardashian.

Breaking via Facebook:

Anyone else’s phone make a retching noise when you unlock it with Face ID?

Going viral on WeChat:

To my beloved wife, I leave my circus and my monkeys.

Trending via Messenger:

The only reason to engage with a neighbor is if either of you is on fire.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

God, I was so happy when I was 18. I wasn’t at the time, but in retrospect I was.

Making waves on Slack:

Until further notice the days of the week are now called thisday, thatday, otherday, someday, yesterday, today and nextday!

Seen just now on Threads:

Netflix should’ve just maybe mailed us all this fight on DVD.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

A person becomes 10 times more attractive not by their looks but by photoshop.

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