Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

I was gonna get on the treadmill, but then the couch will get sad.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

Did you know that it’s actually possible to say, “I don’t know enough about this to have an opinion”?

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

They should make a separate airport for people who know how to act like they’ve been out in public before.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

Apple juice tastes like it wants to be alcohol, but it’s too shy.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

Apparently, if you leave your Tupperware cupboard unorganized for too long, they procreate, and extra lids appear out of nowhere.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

Tested positive for needing a kiss.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

“You’ve changed.” Yeah, I watched a new movie.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

I only accept apologies in cash.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

Got so emotional thinking about the Toy Story aliens. They have each other.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

My kids will never appreciate the amount of extroverting the introvert me does for them.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Dec 31, 2025

3,419

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Discord:

Having a toddler is wild. I’m getting breaking news about Peppa Pig.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

The people who are $30 trillion in debt are giving you a credit score.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

I wish I had a pair of skinny genes.

Breaking via Instagram:

Sometimes I read a text and think, “What a psycho.” And then I press send.

Making waves on Messenger:

Guys have good pics on their dating profiles because their ex took them.

Spotted on Twitch:

I worry a lot about the wild animals in my neighborhood, but I’m beginning to think they don’t worry about me.

Trending via Discord:

Science has enough bodies, I’m donating mine to English lit just to spice things up a bit.

Trending via Twitch:

My parents still haven’t apologized for making me ugly.

Trending via Instagram:

I don’t like this new trend of old people wearing shirts of bands I listened to when I was a kid.

Funny domination quotes

Funny domination quotes bring a cheeky twist to power play situations 😈💥 Whether you’re looking to lighten the mood or add some sass to your day, these witty lines serve up laughs with a side of playful control 😜🔥 Get ready to own the room and crack a smile while doing it! 😎👑 #BossVibes #LaughOutLoud

New funny domination quotes 👇

The only thing keeping me from world domination is a good nap.

0

2 months ago

ambition, domination, good, humor, me, nap, only, procrastination, sleep, thing, world, world domination
Silicon Valley has taken over the world. Remember when nerds had the good manners to be ashamed of themselves?

0

2 months ago

domination, good, humor, manners, nerd, over, remember, shame, silicon, Silicon Valley, taken, technology, valley, world, world domination
World domination? I don’t even want to be responsible for myself.

0

2 months ago

domination, even, humor, i, myself, responsibility, self, want, world, world domination
Cats are the best authoritarians. You will do their bidding, and you will like it.

0

5 months ago

authoritarian, behavior, best, bidding, cat, cats, domination, humor, obedience, pet, pet behavior
Fact: cats sit on your lap to dominate you.

0

5 months ago

behavior, cat, cats, domination, fact, humor, lap, pet, pet behavior, sit

All funny domination quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

15 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m naturally funny because my life is a joke.

85 shares on Snapchat this month:

That fight could’ve been an email.

39 shares on Messenger this month:

I wasn’t planning on moving, but I was just invited to the neighborhood fall potluck, so I guess now I have no choice.

33 shares on YouTube this month:

“Gravy is not a beverage.” Okay, well that’s why I was trying to drink it in the bathroom, so you wouldn’t see me.

86 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My morning coffee makes me feel like I’ve got my shit together. I don’t, but it makes me feel like I do.

26 shares on Pinterest this month:

The worst part of coming out of a hyperfixation is sobering up and looking at all the merch you bought that you didn’t need.

32 shares on WeChat this month:

If I wore a mood ring, it would probably explode immediately.

54 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m glad I have boobs. The last thing I need is people making eye contact with me.

82 shares on Instagram this month:

My husband has entered the “fun socks” years.

10 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Professor, set the time machine for right now. I’m trying to be more present.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

The unemployed urge to say I love you during a job interview.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

The art of today’s art is to persuade people that it’s art.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

No, they’re not “symptoms of depressions.” They’re Blue’s Clues.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I named my dog “5 Miles,” so I can tell people I walk 5 miles every day.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Reminder that you need to be scrolling all day to monitor the situation.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

New year update: losing everything but weight.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

If your cat has ever accidentally fallen into the tub while you were taking bath, you’ve known chaos.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

This entire year has been the Nightmare Before Christmas.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

In case of a disaster, women and children are being evacuated first so men can think about a solution in peace.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t understand how I can remember every word of a song from 1984, but I can’t remember why I walked into the kitchen.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,384

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

Late replies don’t bother me. As long as we’re not in love, or you don’t owe me money, take your time.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

I hate it when my pillow is not pillowing like it should. You have one job. Be a pillow man. You are pillow. Act like one!

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

Job applications are so stupid. “What’s your desired salary?” Ten billion dollars. Next question.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

I hope this email finds you in a well.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

I am re-watching “Narcos,” and I have to say that for someone who smokes so much weed, Pablo Escobar gets a lot done.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

I hate porn that starts off with sex. I need to know why they have sex.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

That gap between Christmas and New Year’s when you can’t tell what day of the week it is.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

I’m basically a taxi today for the kids and dogs.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

A big part of my job as a parent is moving things away from the edges of countertops.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

I just love the lack of privacy in the pharmacy line. Just standing there shouting out my name, date of birth, and exactly what is wrong with me for the world to hear.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Threads:

Being called ‘my love’ is probably the cutest thing, like yes, that’s me. I’m the one you love. I’m the only one you love. I’m your love. Say it again.

Just landed via X:

I hate that moment when you are tired and sleepy but as soon as you go to bed your body is like “just kidding.”

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Laugh all you want. My Encyclopedia Britannica set will never require WiFi.

Just landed via Instagram:

Forget pheromones, barbecue smells are always attractive.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Honestly, shopping beats therapy, anytime. It costs the same and you get a dress out of it.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Birthday sex is having sex to celebrate your parents having sex.

Seen just now on WeChat:

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

People be like “I love your energy” – then drain it.

Just landed via YouTube:

Need a permanent vacuum for unwanted thoughts.

Just shared via Discord:

I’m gonna turn all this pain into something beautiful, like a poorly timed joke that makes everyone feel weird.

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