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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

They should invent a day where I don’t think.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

One day you said w00t for the last time, and didn’t even realize.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

You know you’re mature when you go to the dentist and you are no longer afraid of pain, but of how much it costs.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

Ever ghost an entire event to avoid one ghost from your past?

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

Twitter is fun. You kinda just talk to yourself and sometimes someone replies.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

You spend so long trying to think of a name for your cat only to end up calling them “for god’s sake” and “please stop”.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

I’d be a terrible masseuse. After 5 minutes, I’d be like, “Okay, my turn.”

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

If you like constant interruptions when you’re trying to get something done, then parenting might be for you.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

Love it when you say or do some common sense thing and the other person has “file not found” written all over their face.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

None of this is happening. It’s all in your phone.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Dec 1, 2025

3,808

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via YouTube:

Chugging a woman’s entire drink at the bar and then saying “you’re safe, there is nothing in your drink.”

Just shared via Telegram:

Anyone else’s phone make a retching noise when you unlock it with Face ID?

Going viral on Telegram:

Somebody just told me I was living the dream, I can assure you I have never dreamt of this shit right here.

Shared recently on Discord:

Coffee should just be free for anybody over 30.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Sometimes I get really mad at myself, but not like mad enough to fight myself or anything like that.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Whoever came up with the spelling for “receipt” was an idiopt.

Just shared via WeChat:

My mayor is Muslim, my bagels are Jewish, my Dior is Christian.

Making waves on TikTok:

I give such good nudes that nobody ever needs to ask me for a second one.

Breaking via TikTok:

I commented to a friend that I didn’t know how goofy Scream was. It turns out I have never seen Scream. I saw Scary Movie.

Trending via Instagram:

I just refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good to watch.

Home » Funny Family Time Quotes

Funny family time quotes

New funny family time quotes 👇

3 weeks ago

Commentary:
🎲🤔 "To all the gift-givers of board games for my kids: your presents have officially declared you as honorary family members! So tell us, when can we expect you to make your grand return and actually play with them? We've got Monopoly set up and ready to test friendships… 😉"

activity, board, board game, Christmas, date, family, family time, fun, fun activity, game, gift, kid, kids, parenting, play, play date, time

All funny family time quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Dec 1, 2025

4,051

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

If a woman says “Do what you want!”, then for God’s sake don’t do what you want!

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

The sexiest woman you know is trying to maintain her balance between insanity and genius.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

This year should be named “things I never thought could happen”.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

In retrospect, I guess “one drunken night of stupidity” isn’t the best response when a child asks you where babies come from.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

I’ve been in a bad mood since like 2010.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

“Are you single?” No, I’m in a hallucinationship.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

I’m not like the other girls. I’m a 37 year old man.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

Normalize asking if this is an intervention whenever someone invites you over.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

I would be more patient if it didn’t take so long.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has copied:

If she forgives you, then 30 minutes later comes back mad again: that means she told her friends in her group chat, and the board of directors did not agree.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I didn’t believe in karma until I was scheduled to work at 6am on a holiday.

Making waves on Slack:

You are only young once. After that you have to think up some other excuse.

Live now on Reddit:

I only use ‘sir’ disrespectfully.

Trending via X:

I use subtitles so if I learn anything interesting I can say “I was reading about” instead of “I saw on an episode of Love Island”

Just landed via Instagram:

If swimming is such good exercise, explain whales.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Getting out of a sports bra looks like it should be a professional women’s sport.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Girls ask for help to open a jar, but can throw a couch during an argument.

Just shared via YouTube:

I feel sorry for dogs. They learnt to fetch newspapers, but newspapers are dying. Killed by an internet driven by cats.

Going viral on Snapchat:

It’s strange being the same age as old people.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I wanna be a jellyfish— no heart, no brain, no feelings, no pain— just blub blub blub.

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