Friday the 13th doesn’t even feel creepy cause bad things happen everyday now.

Friday the 13th doesn’t even feel creepy cause bad things happen everyday now.

Commentary:
"Ah, Friday the 13th – just another day in the life when bad luck is like, 'hold my beer' 🍀🌙 Why be afraid of superstitions when reality is out here pulling pranks every day? 😅 #FridayVibes"

If being hydrated is such a great thing, why does it feel like my bladder is pissed off?

If being hydrated is such a great thing, why does it feel like my bladder is pissed off?

Commentary:
"Hydration: the ultimate balancing act between feeling like a well-moisturized plant and having a bladder that's more demanding than a diva on a bad day 🚰😡💦 #HydrationIssues"

I wish people would stop holding back and use social media to tell us how they really feel.

I wish people would stop holding back and use social media to tell us how they really feel.

Commentary:
"Ah, yes, let's bring out the unfiltered, unapologetic truth-tellers! 📢🤭 Who needs subtlety and filters anyway? 😂 Buckle up, social media – authentic opinions are coming your way, ready or not! 🚀💥 #NoHoldingBack"

This year is starting to feel like it needs to be left outside until we see if it can act right.

This year is starting to feel like it needs to be left outside until we see if it can act right.

Commentary:
"Looks like 2022 forgot its manners and needs a time-out! 🙈 Let's hope it learns to behave before we let it back in the party 💃🎉 #YearlyBehaviorIssues"

If you can’t handle me at my worst just imagine how I feel.

If you can’t handle me at my worst just imagine how I feel.

Commentary:
"If you can't handle me at my worst, then you're probably imagining how I feel – like a cat stuck in a room full of cucumbers 🥒🐱 #CantHandleThis"

People should be able to call in healthy: “Look, I’m not coming into the office today. I feel really good and I don’t want to waste it on being at work.“

People should be able to call in healthy: “Look, I’m not coming into the office today. I feel really good and I don’t want to waste it on being at work.“

Commentary:
"Breaking news: local hero ditches work to embrace feeling good 😎✨ Who needs a sick day when you can have a 'feeling awesome day' instead?! 🙌🏼 #WorkGoals #PrioritizeWellness"

One day my kids will move out and discover the dishes don’t clean themselves and I feel for them. I really do.

One day my kids will move out and discover the dishes don’t clean themselves and I feel for them. I really do.

Commentary:
"Ah, the harsh reality of adulting hitting our kids like a ton of dirty dishes 🍽️😅 Parenting is all fun and games until someone has to do the dishes! #TheStruggleIsReal"

I will never understand why our washing machines feel the need to lie about how much time is left. If you need more time, just let me know, that's fine.

I will never understand why our washing machines feel the need to lie about how much time is left. If you need more time, just let me know, that’s fine.

Commentary:
Oh, the mystery of laundry time estimation! 🤔🕒 It's like our washing machines are out there playing a little game of hide and seek with us! "Oh, you thought I'd be done in 10 minutes? Surprise, it's actually 30!" 🎉 Just come clean with us, washing machine, we can handle the truth – and maybe a few extra minutes. 😉🧺 #LaundryDrama

You think you're aging well and then you feel an earlobe hair blowing in the wind.

You think you’re aging well and then you feel an earlobe hair blowing in the wind.

Commentary:
Ah, the classic tale of aging gracefully until your earlobe hair decides to join the breeze party! 🌬️😂 Embrace the unexpected moments of wisdom and earlobe adventures that come with each passing year!

I call my period Shark week. I want to eat everything, I’m snapping at people, I feel huge, people are scared of me, and there is blood everywhere.

I call my period Shark week. I want to eat everything, I’m snapping at people, I feel huge, people are scared of me, and there is blood everywhere.

Commentary:
"Sounds like a legit reason to don a shark costume and embrace your inner predator! 🦈💁‍♀️ Just remember, you're a fearsome force of nature – and maybe keep the snappy comments to a minimum. 🩸😂 #SharkWeekRealness"