Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

“I can’t wait to go back to bed tonight!” Me, 5 minutes after waking up.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

Buying new glasses this week, so a whole bunch of you are about to get a whole lot uglier.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

Back in my day, we had to walk to the TV to change the channel. Uphill, both ways!

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

I can resist everything except temptation.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

Unfortunately, the movie you want to watch is unavailable on your 13 streaming services. You can rent it for $2.99 though.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

When the grocery store moves the aisles around, you should be able to call the cops.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

Get off the internet and go sniff a flower.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

How can vampires enjoy drinking our hot blood in the summer and other thoughts that keep me up at night.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

Car insurance should give you back money at the end of the year for having no accidents.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

I love my cat so much, but how the hell are you that small and take up an entire queen-size mattress?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Dec 31, 2025

3,256

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Twitch:

I’m proud to announce that am winning my fight against sobriety.

Freshly posted on X:

I’m writing a book of obitchuaries for all the people who are dead to me.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

I was about to organise my closet, but I then I found what I was looking for.

Live now on TikTok:

If you can’t handle me while I’m broke, then you don’t deserve me when I have $600.

Spotted on Facebook:

I just want to be treated like a hot little French fry.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Toothache and heartache comes from the same thing, which is something sweet.

Making waves on Discord:

Nobody seems more shocked, disappointed and dismayed than the person behind the post office counter when I arrive and say I’ve got something to post.

Shared recently on Twitch:

“Cut my life into pieces” screamed the earthworm and threw itself in front of my spade.

Spotted on Slack:

Women call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.

Spotted on YouTube:

There’s no way you could go all the way through the desert on a horse with no name, you’d have named it by the end.

Funny jean quotes

Funny jean quotes are the perfect way to celebrate your favorite wardrobe staple with a splash of humor 👖😂 From timeless denim dilemmas to style sass, these witty lines capture the love-hate relationship we all have with our trusty jeans. Whether you’re rocking skinny, ripped, or classic cuts, get ready to laugh out loud and embrace the denim life with a smile! 😄✨ #JeanJokes #DenimLove

New funny jean quotes 👇

Don’t underestimate your white tee and denim jeans.

0

3 days ago

casual, casual wear, clothing, denim, denim jean, fashion, jean, jeans, outfit, style, tee, underestimate, wear, white, white tee
I lied, there’s no sex. I just needed help getting out of my skinny jeans.

0

2 weeks ago

clothing, fashion, getting, help, honesty, humor, i, jean, jeans, just, lie, relationship, sex, skinny, skinny jean, struggle
Aside from cocaine, has anyone figured out what that little pocket on your jeans is for?

0

2 months ago

accessory, anyone, clothing, clothing accessory, cocaine, drug, humor, jean, jeans, little, mystery, pocket
As a parent of a teenage daughter, I would like to formally apologize to my parents for my tube-top and low-rise jeans era.

0

2 months ago

apologize, apology, daughter, era, family, family relationship, fashion, fashion era, gap, generation, generation gap, humor, i, jean, jeans, low-rise, low-rise jean, parent, parents, relationship, teenage, teenage daughter, top, tube, tube top
That little pocket on jeans is the perfect size for the money I have left over after I pay all my bills.

1

2 months ago

after, bill, bills, budgeting, expense, finance, humor, i, jean, jeans, left, leftover, little, money, over, pay, perfect, pocket, size
It’s all fun and games until your jeans don’t fit any more.

0

2 months ago

consequence, fashion, fit, fun, game, humor, jean, jeans, reality, weight
Wondering when these skinny jeans are gonna kick in.

0

2 months ago

body, body image, expectation, fashion, humor, image, jean, jeans, kick, skinny, skinny jean, skinny jeans, style
It’s all fun and games until your jeans no longer fit.

0

3 months ago

clothing, fashion, fit, fun, gain, game, games, humor, jean, jeans, longer, weight, weight gain

All funny jean quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

84 shares on Instagram this month:

This year I’d like an advent calendar with 24 different tranquilizers.

15 shares on Instagram this month:

Do cats have a sense of causation between grooming themselves and coughing up hairballs, or do they think it’s just an annoying separate thing which just happens to them sometimes?

28 shares on X this month:

When you really want to slap someone, do it and say, “Mosquito!

24 shares on Messenger this month:

No Botox. I need to furrow my brow when people say dumb things.

49 shares on Twitch this month:

My reality check bounced, guess I’ll have to stay insane for the time being.

65 shares on Threads this month:

Taking Adderall before going to lay on the beach so I can focus more on having a good time.

16 shares on Discord this month:

Single in the womb, single till the tomb!

70 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Some hoodies don’t hoodie the way other hoodies hoodie.

63 shares on WhatsApp this month:

When you realize a 9 to 5 is actually an 8 to 7, since you cannot teleport to work.

10 shares on Twitch this month:

I think the key to happiness is having plenty of money and then telling all the poor people that money can’t buy happiness.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

If you wave your keys in front of a giant house, people will think you own it.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

If I’m too quiet you can rest assured I’m in the process of planning my sweet escape or your equally sweet demise.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

As a proud husband and father in my 40s, my New Year’s resolution is to sneeze even louder this year.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Nobody cleans better than someone who’s pissed off.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

The Titanic is a great lesson of why “just the tip” can get you into a whole lot of trouble.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

You should always wear a helmet when doing dangerous things or talking about politics.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I offered my nephew a donut and he said “no thanks, I’m not hungry right now” and I don’t think this little guy knows how donuts work.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Helvetica is my favorite font that sounds like a heavy metal band.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve decided to handle this like a mature adult, I’m telling your mom.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

How bad can a decision really be if nobody from the future shows up to stop you?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,275

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

Hired a financial advisor, and his first piece of advice was that I don’t make nearly enough money to justify paying a financial advisor.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

Gay? We don’t use that word anymore. Person of rainbow.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

Unfortunately, it only strengthens my spirit when the summer people mourn their terrible season.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

I bought a calming tea but the smell and taste is making me nervous.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

The younger generation will never know the fear and anxiety of calling your friend’s house, and their parents answer the phone.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

Elevator rides in real life: 30 seconds long. Elevator rides in movies: Two minutes long.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

Christmas is coming and you’re not.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

If my wife and I got divorced and moved to separate states, I’m convinced I would still hear her chewing.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

Ever since I was a little girl, I have loved staying up really late, hanging out with myself, and thinking about stuff and things.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

Responding to any and all emails with ‘wow ok’

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Reddit:

Growing up means choosing cozy couch moments over crowded club scenes. Cheers to adulting!

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

If my house is clean, just know I yelled at everyone for two hours first.

Just shared via Instagram:

Attention to detail is so sexy, study me, baby.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

I’m not even doomscrolling anymore; I’m just regular scrolling, and everything’s doomed.

Seen just now on Slack:

“I’ll just iron my clothes for work in the morning,” he thought in stupid bachelor.

Just shared via Threads:

Using my one phone call to call Santa.

Just shared via Messenger:

All my favorite activities involve a mattress.

Going bananas on Threads:

There should be bloopers at the end of horror movies, so it relaxes you before bedtime.

Spotted on Twitch:

The 69 obsession turning into 67 is a recession indicator.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Blackout curtains because I’ll decide what time it is.

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