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68 Funny kitchen quotes

Trending Funny Kitchen Quotes 🔥

Cooking with glasses on is so humiliating. Why did I just get blinded by steam?
I’m pretty sure my husband’s favorite sound is the oven range fan turning on when I start making dinner.
Toasters aren’t governed by that little dial. They have free will.
I don’t always cook dinner but when I do, I use every pan in the kitchen.
No matter how old you are, when the kitchen roll is empty, you have a telescope.

More funny kitchen quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: My husband cleaned the kitchen for the first time in years. He’s in the living room, dressed in a suit, waiting for the award ceremony to commence.

Commentary:
Looks like someone deserves a standing ovation for this kitchen-cleaning milestone! 👏🎉 Who needs the Oscars when you've got a spouse in a suit awaiting their well-deserved recognition ceremony in the living room? 🕺👔 #DomesticAwardsNight
5 months ago
Share →: You know you’re a bad cook when the dog won’t lick the plate.

Commentary:
🐶🍽️ "When even the dog turns up his nose at your cooking, you know you've reached a whole new level of 'culinary expertise'. Maybe it's time to let that microwave have a turn in the spotlight! 😄👩‍🍳"
5 months ago
Share →: I hope your spoon slides into your soup.

Commentary:
"May your spoon be as slippery as your excuses when it comes to tackling responsibilities! 🥄🍲😄"
5 months ago
Share →: Today’s the day I’m gonna’ make the onions cry.

Commentary:
"Watch out, world! Today, the onions better grab their tissues because they're in for a good cry 😂💦 Let the tears flow as this chef gets ready to cook up a storm! 🧅🔪 #OnionTears"
5 months ago
Share →: Salt and pepper shakers add an air of mystique to any bathroom.

Commentary:
"Who knew seasoning your food and your bathroom could be so stylish? 🧂🚽✨ Talk about adding some flavor to your bathroom experience! 😉 #SpiceUpYourLife"
5 months ago
Share →: Shuffling into the kitchen in a robe Sunday morning to change the clock on the microwave is the lamest form of time travel ever.

Commentary:
"Who knew time travel could be so mundane? 🕰️🧳 I guess superhero capes are optional when adjusting the microwave clock on a lazy Sunday morning! ⏰😆 #LamestTimeTravelEver"
5 months ago
Share →: I don’t know how to mop my kitchen floor without pretending l’m cleaning up a gruesome crime scene.

Commentary:
"Who needs a detective when you've got a mop and a vivid imagination? 🕵️‍♂️💦 Just remember, the only mystery here is whether you'll finish cleaning or get too caught up in your crime scene reenactment! 🔍😂 #CleaningChronicles"
5 months ago
Share →: Cooking with glasses on is so humiliating. Why did I just get blinded by steam?

Commentary:
Oh, the perils of culinary vision impairment! 👓🔥 Who knew that steam could strike back with such vengeance? Perhaps it's time to invest in some anti-fogging goggles for your next kitchen escapade! 😆🍳
5 months ago
Share →: Waiting for toast to toast takes forever unless you walk away for 10 seconds, then it burns.

Commentary:
Ah, the eternal struggle of toasting – a delicate dance between impatience and charred disappointment. 🍞⏳ One must possess the perfect blend of vigilance and nonchalance to achieve the elusive state of golden brown perfection. 🔥🙈 After all, there's a fine line between a well-toasted slice and a fire hazard waiting to happen! 🔥🚫 Remember, while the toast might take its sweet time, life moves fast – so never miss
5 months ago
Share →: If you stare at your face in the back of a spoon you look a lot like someone who doesn’t know how to use cutlery.

Commentary:
When you gaze at your reflection in a spoon, it's like a self-portrait of a cutlery aficionado in distress 😂🥄 Remind me not to ask you to set the dinner table!