You ask for a Swedish massage and then get mad when I roll meatballs on your back.

You ask for a Swedish massage and then get mad when I roll meatballs on your back.

Commentary:
"Who knew a massage could turn into a Swedish food fest? 🇸🇪🍝 Next time, specify 'hands only' for your own sake! 😉"

There should be a Mad Max movie that reveals the world outside Australia has actually remained pretty normal.

There should be a Mad Max movie that reveals the world outside Australia has actually remained pretty normal.

Commentary:
"Plot twist: Turns out the rest of the world didn't get the apocalypse memo and is just casually sipping lattes and scrolling through memes while Australia is battling desert bandits. 🌏☕️😂 #MadMaxRealityCheck"

I went to a mind reader. She almost went mad.

I went to a mind reader. She almost went mad.

Commentary:
"Apparently predicting the future is not as easy as she thought! 🔮😂 It seems this mind reader got a taste of her own medicine and boy, did it leave her mind blown! 💥😆"

If people love cheese so much, why are they mad when someone smells like cheese.

If people love cheese so much, why are they mad when someone smells like cheese.

Commentary:
"Seems like a classic case of 'love from afar, but hold your nose up close' 🧀💨 Maybe we all just need our space when it comes to cheese and its aromas! 😄"

Twitter is fun because you can post a pic of pizza and people will get mad at you.

Twitter is fun because you can post a pic of pizza and people will get mad at you.

Commentary:
"Twitter: Where sharing a slice of pizza could start a virtual war 🍕🔥 Who knew a simple photo could stir up so much controversy? Just remember, in the Twitterverse, even the cheesiest topics can be taken oh-so-seriously!"

Driving is great because it combines my love of sitting with my love of being mad.

Driving is great because it combines my love of sitting with my love of being mad.

Commentary:
"Ah, the perfect activity for those who enjoy the thrill of sitting angrily in traffic jams 🚗💨. Who knew that combining two passions – sitting and fuming – could bring so much satisfaction on the road? It's all about finding joy in the little things, even if those things involve honking and road rage! 🤣 #DrivingAdventures"

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

Commentary:
"Who needs sleep when you can have a good old-fashioned argument instead? 💤🥊 Just remember, bruised egos heal faster than a bad night's rest! 😂 #RelationshipGoals"

Mad that so many renaissance artists were named after ninja turtles.

Mad that so many renaissance artists were named after ninja turtles.

Commentary:
"Renaissance art lovers be like: Leonardo da Vinci, Raphael, Donatello, and Michelangelo… Was Splinter their art instructor?! 🎨🐢 #TeenageMutantArtists"

I don’t get mad anymore. I'm just like “again?” Ok then.

I don’t get mad anymore. I’m just like “again?” Ok then.

Commentary:
🤷‍♂️ "I don't get mad, I get impressed with life's consistency in testing my patience. It's like a daily pop quiz I never asked for, but hey, let's roll with it. Bring it on, universe! 🙄"