Commentary:
"Imagine having a built-in memory bank in your brain for remembering those awkward 'wait, do I know you?' encounters… π€π§ #FacialRecognitionUpgradeFailed"
1901 Funny me quotes
Hey, I noticed youβre completely uninterested in me and couldnβt care whether I live or die. Would you like to build a life together?
Commentary:
"Ah, the perfect recipe for a long-lasting relationship: one part indifference, one part sarcasm, and a sprinkle of existential crisis. π€·ββοΈπ Who can resist such a compelling offer? Let's start a sitcom called 'The Apathetic Duo' and see where this complete disinterest takes us! ππ "
No, you tell me what YOU were doing during that gap in my resume.
You cannot hurt me. You are not a hip-height table corner.
If you ever see me running, itβs either away from my problems or towards an ice cream van.
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My bearβs diarrhea problems are really starting to worry me. The vet says heβs getting better but heβs not out of the woods yet.
Them: OMG, I havenβt seen you in so long. Me: Yeah, that was on purpose.
Just once Iβd like my dog to give me a treat.
In my 20βs: I want to find true love. In my 40βs: I just want a toaster that gets me.
Commentary:
Ah, the evolution of priorities! π€£ Who needs love when you can have a perfectly toasted slice of bread, am I right? ππ₯ Priorities shift from heart-shaped endeavors to just hoping for a toaster that understands your toasting preferences. Life sure takes some unexpected turns! π
