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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

Bedtime procrastination isn’t a sleep issue. It’s a control issue. It’s about refusing to give up the last part of the day that feels like yours.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

How lazy are you?” I greet people by raising my eyebrows.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

By the time someone says, ‘To make a long story short,’ it’s too late.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

I hate when my kids ask me impossible questions like: What day is it?

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

I just hit the back arrow on a website, and it took me to a page that said, “Before you leave.” No. I already made the decision.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

My brain is 80% song lyrics.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

It’s important to listen to both sides of the debate because you need to hear both the reality of the situation and also the dumbest thing anyone’s ever said.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

Having someone sing you to sleep is so comforting, until you realize you are the only one in the room.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

Cocaine is God’s way of telling you that you make too much money.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

If your first child is uncomplicated, then it’s a trick of nature to get you to have a second child. The second will be an unpredictable bundle of energy that seems to get by without sleep.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,560

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Slack:

How come it’s called “thrift store shopping” instead of Goodwill hunting?

Seen just now on Pinterest:

You can tell a group isn’t gonna make it big just by their name.

Live now on Facebook:

The most dangerous drinking game I play, is seeing how long I can go without coffee.

Just landed via YouTube:

I was disappointed to learn today that my request for a sabbatical was rejected. Apparently that’s “not how marriage works.”

Just shared via Reddit:

Twitter is an abusement park.

Spotted on Slack:

Apparently, staying to yourself and not bothering people bothers people.

Breaking via Reddit:

When I say “I’m open to feedback” I mean “I accept compliments.”

Breaking via Reddit:

They should invent a situationship that turns into something beautiful.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Money doesn’t impress me. Giving it to me does.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I embarrass myself in front of myself.

Funny skydiving quotes

Funny skydiving quotes bring the thrill of freefall to life with a splash of humor and adrenaline 😂🪂 Whether you’re a fearless flyer or just love a good laugh from 10,000 feet up, these witty sayings capture the wild, windy, and wonderfully weird side of jumping out of a plane! 🚀🌤️ Get ready to smile, giggle, and maybe even feel the rush without leaving the ground! 😜✨

New funny skydiving quotes 👇

All funny skydiving quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

88 shares on WeChat this month:

Knowing I’ve been called crazy, but never ugly, is how I sleep at night.

52 shares on Discord this month:

Pet owners be like “this is my pet Snoopy, but their nicknames are Booboo and Thicky Boy!”

28 shares on Slack this month:

4 sneezes in a row is clout chasing. Wrap it up!

40 shares on TikTok this month:

Be the reason someone spits out their drink today.

44 shares on X this month:

I listen to a lot of white noise, so I get really excited when it rains or someone turns on a fan. It’s like seeing my favorite band live.

76 shares on Threads this month:

Every time I get the urge to clean, I watch Hoarders and I decide my house isn’t that dirty after all.

82 shares on X this month:

I came home to find my boyfriend mopping the floor and my first thought was, “who’d he kill?”

38 shares on Discord this month:

Notice how Lorde has a song called “Tennis Court” and not “Pickleball Court”? Tired of y’all pushing that fake sport.

100 shares on WeChat this month:

The awkward moment when someone’s zipper is down and you don’t know whether to tell them or not.

16 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Relationship status: he escaped.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Dear women, when you’re not around we load the dishwasher properly.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Teens be like, “You know that crumbled up piece of paper that’s been on the table all week? I need it for school.”

6 folks are currently checking 👀

If you want your kid to play with their toy just give it to your other kid. Follow me for more parenting hacks.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Hey, we’re calling off the search party. We found a different guy out there we like more.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Bag of salad is the boxed wine of vegetables.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Lifting my wife’s wedding veil and finding out she’s Darth Maul.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I have a very particular set of useless skills.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Toddlers: the brutally honest roommates nobody asked for!

16 folks are currently checking 👀

My step counter doesn’t judge. For him, steps to the fridge are just as valuable as a walk.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I stay up late every night, regret it in the morning, and the next day I do it all over again.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,467

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

I’ll kill the vibe, so you don’t have to.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

Everyone’s a gangster until the grocery store switches their aisles around.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

It’s like my therapist always says, that’ll be $175.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

My hobbies include trying to close the elevator doors before anyone else gets on.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

I would like you to meet my significant other. Her name is Cheese.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

The best thing about living with my parents is being woken up four minutes before my alarm to be told my alarm is about to go off.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

Sundries sounds like something grandma would call scandalous underwear.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

We live in a cosmic tornado, but sure, let’s all get jobs.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

My kids are smart but sometimes they say dumb stuff like, “Mom, why do you always buy Snickers when you’re the only one who likes them?”

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Give us this day our daily internet validation.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Facebook:

Maybe if we paid our streaming services even more, they could stop jacking up the volume on the commercials they make us watch, even though we are paying for the service.

Going viral on Threads:

If someone wants to spend time with you, they’ll let you know. Get rid of those people.

Breaking via Reddit:

Slapping the TV remote on your knee extends the battery life. It’s science.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Death by a thousand stupid questions.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Monday has a personal vendetta against my happiness.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Strangers vomiting their beliefs all over you every day is not good for the soul.

Just shared via X:

Maybe if we sit extremely still, Monday won’t be able to see us.

Live now on Instagram:

I took a pole and found that 100% of people in the tent were angry.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

The trouble with living alone is that it’s always my turn to do the dishes.

Making waves on Discord:

Sometimes you just gotta say LOL and move on.

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