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14 Funny sucks quotes

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  • 4 out 3 people struggle with math.

    Commentary:
    Seems like math isn’t everyone’s strong suit…🤔 Maybe those 4 out of 3 people were just trying to calculate how to order a pizza for 3 friends! 🍕 Who knew numbers could be so tricky! 😂 #MathHumor

  • Prophecy class has been cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances.

    Commentary:
    “Looks like the future didn’t see this coming! 🔮🚫 Who could have predicted this plot twist? Now we’ll never know what the crystal ball had in store for us! 😅 #UnexpectedTwists”

  • Honestly, shopping beats therapy, anytime. It costs the same and you get a dress out of it.

    Commentary:
    “Who needs therapy when you can have a fabulous dress? 💁‍♀️🛍️ Retail therapy is the best kind of self-care – with a side of fashion! 💃💳 #ShoppingHeals”

  • My goal was to look good in a bikini this summer, but the call of the barbecue is stronger.

    Commentary:
    🍔🔥 “My goal was to rock that bikini this summer, but alas, the alluring sizzle of the barbecue proved to be a formidable opponent. Can’t resist the aroma of grilled goodness! Looks like my summer body will have to wait… Pass me the BBQ sauce! 😅👙”

  • I’ll stop being so lazy when being so lazy stops being so awesome.

    Commentary:
    “Who knew laziness could be so fabulous? 😂 It’s a tough choice between getting things done and embracing the awesomeness of laziness! 💁‍♂️💤 Keep slaying that lazy game, my friend!”

  • I don’t know why “you made your bed now lie in it” is a bad thing. It sounds great! I’ll even lie in a bed I didn’t make.

    Commentary:
    “Whoever said ‘you made your bed now lie in it’ clearly never experienced the luxury of freshly-made hotel beds 🛏️. I’ll happily lie in any bed as long as there’s a cozy blanket and some good snacks nearby! 💁‍♂️😂 #LazyLuxury”

  • Do you ever feel like you’re a white shirt and life is a red wine?

    Commentary:
    Well, isn’t life just the sommelier of chaos! 🍷👔 One moment you’re crisp and pristine like a white shirt, and the next thing you know, you’re stained with the bold hues of red wine – a fashion faux pas of epic proportions! Here’s to navigating the spills and splashes of life with elegance and a handy bottle of stain remover! 💃🍇

  • At what point is a salad no longer a salad based on how much bacon I add?

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the eternal salad dilemma – when does it transform from a bed of healthy greens to a sneaky delivery vehicle for crispy, delicious bacon? 🥗🥓🤔 Let’s just say, if you need to go hunting for lettuce amongst the bacon bits, you might have crossed that ‘salad’ line!”

  • It’s like no one in my family appreciates that I stayed up all night overthinking for them.

    Commentary:
    “Trying to explain to your family the mental gymnastics you’ve been doing all night like 🤯💤… And all they can say is ‘Who asked you to overthink, though?’ 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️ #TheOverthinkingStruggle”

  • Our parents were right all along, the music is too loud.

    Commentary:
    🎶 “Our parents were right all along, the music is too loud.” 🎵 Looks like we’ve officially reached the age where we appreciate a quiet night in over a raging concert! 😂 Who knew we’d actually start missing the sound of silence? 🤫 #FeelingOldButWise

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