Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

Love that every time I finish a snack I have to wave my hands around to prove to my dog it’s all gone, like I’m cashing him out at a casino or something.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has viewed:

I thought you are the sunshine of my life, but you are just a meteor trying to destroy my world.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Adulthood is wild. One day I’m transferring money to my savings account, and three days later, I’m transferring it out to save myself.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

Microplastics are a waste of time. I go straight to eating whole packaging.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

This morning, like every morning, he practiced his quick draw of his finger guns in the bathroom mirror, because you just never know.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

The prettier you are, the weirder it gets.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

I don’t have read receipts on my phone because why would I tell on myself like that?

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

For someone who loves to sleep so much, you’d think I’d go to bed earlier.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror this morning, so I guess once again my personality will be doing all the work today.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

Being a people pleaser that no one is pleased with is the main cause of my anxiety.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,336

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Pinterest:

69% of people find something dirty in every sentence.

Going bananas on Threads:

If you bring an acoustic guitar to a bonfire, I’m going to assume it’s for fuel.

Going viral on TikTok:

Planking is the only time we appreciate time.

Seen just now on Telegram:

The female brain works like the internet. You can delete something, but it’s never really gone.

Just shared via Slack:

This year I’d like an advent calendar with 24 different tranquilizers.

Spotted on Facebook:

She’s got style, she’s got grace, she crams french fries in her face.

Just shared via YouTube:

Love is in the air fryer.

Shared recently on Twitch:

A relationship is like a shark, it looks better on TV.

Going viral on WeChat:

There is nothing like a little tomato soup to soothe the soul, even if it’s cold, over ice, with a celery stalk and vodka.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

It’s crazy that you don’t really argue with a baby for the first year of its life and then you have to argue with the baby every day.

Funny take off quotes

Funny take off quotes 🚀✈️ bring a burst of laughter to those moments when planes leave the ground and adventure begins! Whether you’re a frequent flyer or a nervous newbie, these witty lines add humor to the thrill of soaring sky-high 🌤️😄. Get ready to giggle and lift off with a smile as we explore the funniest ways to celebrate that magical moment of takeoff! 😂🛫

New funny take off quotes 👇

All funny take off quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

38 shares on TikTok this month:

Nothing you want to do has a timeline.

36 shares on Threads this month:

Got possessed by a demon once, and everyone was like, “OMG, did you do something with your hair?”

42 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If you don’t have a favorite spatula yet, you still have some growing up to do.

42 shares on TikTok this month:

Fasted for 72 hours and gained the ability to whisper to bats.

40 shares on Messenger this month:

Every person you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Make it worse by asking if they’re drinking enough water.

83 shares on Twitch this month:

My skin is so dry it’s doing a PowerPoint presentation.

62 shares on Telegram this month:

“I’m doing better than my parents at my age. They had, like, no followers.”

55 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I like how the Tooth Fairy got the job, and then subbed it out to everyone’s parents. That’s called “business savvy.”

25 shares on Slack this month:

Always stay crazy. Otherwise you’ll go crazy.

32 shares on Pinterest this month:

Wine drunk doesn’t even make itself known. You’re just relaxed, and then, all of a sudden, you feel sexier.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t disrespect me and then be the moral compass on how I respond.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Just eating the emotional support snickers bar in my purse. How about you?

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m getting targeted ads about chin fat and I’m offended by the relevance.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

My goal for next month is small, simple, and clear: change my whole entire life.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Does anyone know where I can find true love?

13 folks are currently checking 👀

So, if you are too tired to speak, sit next to me, because I am fluent in silence.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Writing ‘thanks.’ instead of ‘thanks!’ so you know I’m mad.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t always seize the day. Sometimes I poke the day with my index finger and go, ew, ew, ew, ew.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate when people set alarms and it wakes up everybody except for them.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Someone should bite my inner thighs just to see what type of noises I make. For science.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,687

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

Welcome to your 50’s, you’ll look for your phone while scrolling on your phone.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has downloaded:

AI is that friend who is always there for you but gives terrible advice.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

I’ve been commissioned to kiss you on the lips. I need to get this done by tonight.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Well, well, well, if it isn’t the holiday traffic I said I’d avoid even though I did nothing to avoid it.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

The reward for doing really good work is more work.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

Me: what can possibly go wrong though. Anxiety: I’m glad you asked.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

My kids have been joking for weeks about a new Pokémon called Puke-Achu and then they got the stomach flu and brought it to life.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

America is like that TV show that’s been on for too long, and the writers don’t know what to do, so they just make anything happen.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

You don’t have to be crazy to be friends with me. I also train people.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

By accepting their pardons, the turkeys are admitting guilt.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Instagram:

Waiting until 4:59 p.m. on Fridays to send an email, because any response is Monday’s problem.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

The worst part about re-watching Home Alone is you just know Kevin’s parents bought this house for like $250K.

Going viral on Pinterest:

“I’m not short. I’m just more down to earth than most people.”

Trending via Threads:

Hate when people ask “why is it called Silence of the Lambs?” Like, did you hear any lambs during the movie? Use your head!

Just shared via Instagram:

Sorry for levitating at the end of your bed all night, I just think you’re really cute.

Shared recently on X:

Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It’s the transition that’s troublesome.

Seen just now on Telegram:

In a relationship with my bedroom fan.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Another Netflix price increase? Guess we’re only chilling now.

Breaking via TikTok:

Quitting my job to pursue my true passion: not working.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

My problem is I buy outfits I don’t have shoes for and shoes I don’t have outfits for.

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