Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

Being silly is very important for my mental health.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I would love to see AI be unemployed.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

I generally don’t know what the hell I’m doing, but I’m really good at it.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

Sorry I can’t have a pleasant, safe and affordable life, my government said no.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

I may not be the smartest or most athletic man in the world. There’s no second part to this, keep scrolling.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

Not trying to brag but I just beat the high score on this blood pressure machine.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

I hope your day is as nice as my ass.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

Mood to play music louder than my thoughts.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Next time I die, I’m going to make sure I’m reincarnated someplace other than Earth.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

This summer went by so fast, I didn’t even get a chance to lose any weight.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,688

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Discord:

I need to figure out what I’m going to wear to the couch on New Year’s Eve.

Live now on WeChat:

If you don’t fall in love with me, I’ll write poetry about you and then you’ll regret it.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Not to brag, but I boiled the right amount of pasta. Once. Five years ago.

Trending via X:

How to have flat stomach: remove all of your organs.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I have so much planned today that I was already tired thinking of it yesterday.

Seen just now on X:

I’m an over-explainer (I explain things too much).

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I really miss kissing. I hope next year favors my lips.

Breaking via Messenger:

I’m at the age where I understand that paying a little extra for convenience and comfort is absolutely okay.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Nothing is smaller than the X on ads to click them away.

Spotted on Twitch:

Watermelon. The fruit that comes with a workout.

17 Funny urgency quotes

Funny urgency quotes bring a hilarious twist to those moments when time feels like it’s racing against you ⏰😂. Whether you’re procrastinating or just need a laugh to shake off the stress, these witty lines remind us to take life a little less seriously while still getting things done 🚀💡. Ready to giggle your way through deadlines and last-minute chaos? Let’s dive into some humor that turns urgency into pure fun! 🎉🤣

New funny urgency quotes 👇

For even more funny urgency quotes, hit next 👇

All funny urgency quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

41 shares on Slack this month:

The agony of thinking you’re finished doing the dishes, only to turn around and, to your horror, the pot.

58 shares on Instagram this month:

I love ordering things online because when they arrive it’s like a present from me to me.

30 shares on Snapchat this month:

One day you’re young and carefree and the next you sneeze too hard and hurt your neck.

46 shares on Snapchat this month:

Coffee is just goth water.

37 shares on YouTube this month:

McDonald’s needs a 3rd window so you can trade in all the wrong stuff they gave you.

15 shares on Twitch this month:

My superpower is keeping this couch cushion warm.

65 shares on X this month:

There’s an unwritten rule: if you need something and it’s available at your mom’s house, it’s yours.

58 shares on Pinterest this month:

Be the spooky thing in the woods that you wish to see in the world.

80 shares on Threads this month:

Be nice today, the world is on fire.

27 shares on Instagram this month:

No more ragebaiting around me, please. Let’s try joybaiting, perhaps even lovebaiting.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Me, in heaven: Can you take a photo of me sitting on that cloud?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m sorry you had a bad experience at our restaurant. To make it up to you, here is a coupon for more of our terrible, terrible food.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

The smaller the woman, the bigger the attitude. It’s science.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

No one is excited to see me in shorts except mosquitoes.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Make sure you bury me near a bathroom because death is long, and I’m sure I’ll still have to get up and pee.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

We keep a potato masher in a drawer because sometimes it’s fun to not be able to open that drawer.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Nice to finally get back that hour they stole earlier this year.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Everyone hates on Gollum but he had the right idea: become a hermit, collect jewels, swim naked in lakes and pools, occasionally hiss at people who try to make you go places.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Throwing a spear at your enemy is a bad gamble. If you miss, you have no spear now and he’s just fine. He’s better than fine; now he has a spear.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Not to brag, but I drove and found a place I was looking for without turning down my music today.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,718

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

Every man’s biggest fear is trying a new barber.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

Quit keeping your enemies closer. No wonder you feel like shit.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

Hey boy, are you my washing machine? Because neither of you know how long 10 minutes last.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

There’s no post-breakup healing process for girls. You just wake up one day and be like, “Ew,” and you’re free.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

You know Santa isn’t real because no man over 40 is out past 9PM.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

Women know the exact weight of their children and their age in days. Men just know that little people live with them.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

Thank god I played a lot of Tetris as a kid or I never would have been able to get everything into the freezer.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

They don’t put cars in malls anymore, like they used to.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

No one talks about the horrific event of meeting someone who is exactly your type.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Messenger:

Make it a habit to cry and act unhinged at meetings so you’re never invited back.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Nowadays, people no longer look for a needle in a haystack, but for errors in a spreadsheet.

Breaking via TikTok:

Met my soulmate again today: mashed potatoes and gravy.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.

Shared recently on Slack:

Men become instantly more attractive when they wear aviators; it’s science.

Just shared via Discord:

I’m just trying to have a nice time despite knowing facts and information.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

We interrupt coverage of one horrible story for breaking news of another horrible story.

Breaking via Pinterest:

The biggest problem with working from home? I want to go home even though I’m already at home.

Making waves on TikTok:

According to my chocolate advent calendar, tomorrow is Christmas.

Just landed via Discord:

Gravity, at all times, is trying to pull your pants down.

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