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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

Women are so hot, I wish they were good people.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

People always talk about how they love to sit in their cars for a while once they get home. Whenever I do that, my Uber driver yells at me.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

Forget tequila, I’m at the age where you can wake up with a hangover from Netflix.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

“I’m not dramatic. I just react with the intensity of a Shakespearean widow at all times.”

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Just broke a clothes hanger and now have seven years of bad outfits.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

The female ability to be able to guess exactly which girl it is out of his 740 following.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

Do other people remember toasters with wings flying across our computer screens or was that a fever dream I just had?

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

Not to brag, but I skipped my mid-life crisis and went straight to cranky old man.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

Remember when the FBI would threaten you at the beginning of every VHS tape? That was pretty cool.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

Those who still fit in their wedding dresses years later haven’t been making enough effort eating.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,637

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Snapchat:

Make sure you bury me near a bathroom because death is long, and I’m sure I’ll still have to get up and pee.

Just shared via Facebook:

Ordering 600 pizzas from Washington, D.C., to rug pull on Polymarket.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Sometimes I read a text and think, “What a psycho.” And then I press send.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

If I got a Dollar for every time I thought about you, I would start thinking about you.

Just shared via Instagram:

I have had songs stuck in my head and I have had people stuck in my head, I highly recommend songs.

Just landed via Discord:

It’s like ten thousand views when all you need is a like.

Trending via YouTube:

I’m at that age where someone can call me the wrong name and I’m just like “whatever, I’ll be Dan for a minute”.

Spotted on Discord:

Sometimes the laugh is funnier than the joke itself.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Having teens is fun because they demand their independence but then turn right around and ask you for $20.

Trending via YouTube:

Asking for a cigarette, then adding it to my own pack.

Funny wrapper quotes

Funny wrapper quotes bring a burst of laughter 🎉 to your snacks and gifts, turning ordinary moments into unforgettable delights 😄. Whether you’re unwrapping treats or passing out presents, these witty words add a sprinkle of humor 🍫🎁 that’s sure to crack smiles and spark joy. Ready to unwrap some chuckles? Let’s dive into the world of clever, quirky, and downright hilarious wrapper fun! 😂✨

New funny wrapper quotes 👇

All funny wrapper quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

71 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m sorry, but when you call me ‘batshit crazy’ it’s almost starting to sound like you think it’s a bad thing!

60 shares on Pinterest this month:

I learned that when dogs lean against you it’s their version of hugging and now every time my dog leans against me my eyes start leaking.

88 shares on Instagram this month:

The sole purpose of some household items is to make it impossible for you to open the damn drawer.

70 shares on X this month:

Why have abs when you can have kebabs?

62 shares on Messenger this month:

At no single point in the Bible does it tell you not to sell drugs.

72 shares on Threads this month:

I don’t always push on pull doors but when I do, I do it two or three times to confirm how dumb I really am.

36 shares on Snapchat this month:

I love posting my thoughts on the internet. Now they’re your problem.

97 shares on Snapchat this month:

Your soulmate wouldn’t do you like that, by the way.

100 shares on Twitch this month:

My tattoo means that I can’t be trusted with $200.

94 shares on Facebook this month:

The 80s were wild, man. You had bands naming themselves after predatory cats with hearing problems.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

19 folks are currently checking 👀

The house from Hansel and Gretel but made out of tacos.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Airport security asked me if I’ve seen anything unusual. I just paid $18 for a coke & a sandwich. Let’s start with that.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

When I don’t have money, I stop talking to women out of respect.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Of all the things to lose why couldn’t it have been my appetite and not my mind.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Eating nothing but beer for a month and calling that Oktoberfast.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

That moment your alarm clock goes off in the morning and you don’t know whether to get dressed or fake an illness.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

You can’t confuse me. I already don’t know what’s going on.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Internet strangers offer the best advice.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Called in, “Taking a gap year.”

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Why do they call it a garage sale instead of a garbage sale?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,694

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

Twitter is basically everyone’s therapist’s couch.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

Someone you haven’t talked to in forever will show up in your dream just to do a backflip.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

I’m a little too self-aware to enjoy life, and a little too delusional to give up.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

The only career advice I have is make every decision that moves you closer to not having to be on LinkedIn.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

Cynics are – beneath it all – only idealists with awkwardly high standards.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

Sorry to interrupt your scrolling, but I hope life gets better for you.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

Gonna toot my own horn here because I made it through another day without turning any of my feelings into felonies.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

Show me in the employee handbook where it says I can’t make weird noises in my cubicle.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

Ever since I was little, I always knew I wanted to retire.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

The Midwest urge to have a drink on a patio as soon as it’s nice out.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via LinkedIn:

I’m drinking coffee so I don’t say mean things to you. You’re welcome.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I think if you ask Kanye for a million at the right time, he’ll give it to you.

Going viral on Messenger:

If I win the lottery, I’m buying four politicians and some really nice shoes.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Might quit my job to focus on summer.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I am like the weather. Temporarily friendly.

Making waves on Discord:

Instead of likes, we should get a little kiss.

Making waves on WeChat:

Another beautiful day without using sin, tan and cos.

Trending via Telegram:

Her: how are you still single? Me: it’s easier than you think.

Trending via Instagram:

Just found out my asexual friend was only using me for my companionship.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

My fridge turns into a food retirement home, as soon as I buy groceries.

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