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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

My kid asked where babies come from and I said everywhere, man, they’re worldwide.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

Your twenties are for working towards a life you later won’t want.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

Welcome to your 40’s: you get excited about avocados now.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

I feel like an adult spelling bee would humble a lot of us.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

Back in the good old days, we didn’t have to trim our toenails, they just got wore down naturally from running from dinosaurs.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, “Oh no, it’s a cop”?

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

This post ain’t gonna like itself, damn.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

Tested positive for needing a kiss.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

When I was little, I didn’t care what I wore. I just went along with what my parents chose. When I look in old photo albums, l realize that they didn’t care either.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

Dating apps are no place for meeting your soulmate. The best way to find your soulmate is to tweet really good.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,272

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Threads:

Yeah, no worries, man. You just showed everyone that you have a lot of resentments bubbling underneath, but otherwise, it was a cool evening.

Going viral on Instagram:

I think you’re like the cat’s meow, annoying yet sweet.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

If a tree falls on your ex in the woods and no one’s around to hear it, you should probably still get rid of the chainsaw.

Going viral on Discord:

I was disappointed to learn today that my request for a sabbatical was rejected. Apparently that’s “not how marriage works.”

Making waves on Facebook:

The only thing you can count on with some people is that you can’t count on them.

Broadcasted on Threads:

No amount of daylight can save us.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Ripping the fishnets off my slutty little oranges.

Trending via Instagram:

My kids had to work extra hard this morning but they were able to get the clean house back to it’s normal messy state just in time for the guests to arrive.

Breaking via X:

A couple of birds are outside fighting. Wait. They’ve quieted down. There’s a third bird. I think he may be their therapist.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Sometimes the laugh is funnier than the joke itself.

Funny advanced quotes

Funny advanced quotes bring a clever twist to everyday wisdom 🤓✨ Perfect for those who love humor with a brainy edge, these witty gems will make you laugh and think at the same time 😂🧠 Whether you’re a pun pro or just enjoy a smart chuckle, get ready to level up your joke game and share some seriously clever vibes! 🎉📝

New funny advanced quotes 👇

All funny advanced quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

60 shares on Snapchat this month:

When someone says “I don’t want a relationship right now” the “at least not with you” is silent.

46 shares on TikTok this month:

Someone yelled “hey, retard!” and I looked back.

56 shares on WeChat this month:

I think my soulmate might be carbs.

30 shares on Pinterest this month:

Going to a wedding really reminds me of the important things in life. Like cake.

97 shares on Telegram this month:

That awkward moment when someone you hate is breathing.

38 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The easiest way to bundle your home and auto insurance is to live in your car.

75 shares on Pinterest this month:

People who say “teamwork makes the dream work” are the reason that some people want to punch other people in the face.

14 shares on Threads this month:

The sexual tension between me and buying more books.

42 shares on X this month:

I wish I could physically experience the inside of a lava lamp.

67 shares on Telegram this month:

Mambo No. 5, but it’s in a minor key, and I’m naming women who didn’t text me back.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I would love to be the reason you look at your phone and smile. Then walk into a wall.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

My sex face is the same as my first pee in three hours face.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

A marriage is about solving problems together, you know, those problems you wouldn’t have if you were single.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry I can’t come today. My sister’s friend’s mother’s grandpa’s brother’s grandson’s uncle’s fish died, and it was tragic.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

No longer praying on your downfall. I will be directly involved.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to your 40’s: you’re not hungover, it’s just Tuesday.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

My outdoor flowers are doing amazing this year because I left them at the garden center where they belong.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t know why hair extensions are exclusive to women, I want to look like a centaur.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I found a box of VHS tapes. I’m a bit nervous about the one that has the label torn off.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Just saw my evil doppelganger speed away in a DeLorean. I’m sure it’s fine.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,615

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

One time I refused to buy a watch because it was only waterproof to 100 meters. Not sure what sort of future I was imagining for myself there.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

A spiral is just a circle that’s afraid of closure.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

Sometimes being a woman is just trying to figure out if you’re hormonally sad, seasonally sad, or genuinely falling apart.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

I fear one day I’ll see one of my posts marked as an “Exhibit A”

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

70% of the planet is covered in water, yet here I am drowning in bullshit.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

Threatening my husband with tariffs every time he tries to make me watch sports on TV.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

I love when my Uber driver and I both shut the hell up for a full ride.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

If you saw me licking the plate after the charcuterie was finished, no you didn’t.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

I was going to buy my wife a car for Christmas but then I remembered I don’t live in a commercial.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

Being bilingual means stuttering in both languages.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

“Are you dating anyone?” I close my eyes when I walk past mirrors.

Trending via Discord:

I’m quitting my job to do topless tarot readings on the beach.

Shared recently on YouTube:

In an effort to keep the employees motivated and increase morale, my boss has asked me to stop talking to everyone.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

“Can you multitask?” Yes, actually I am losing my mind and chilling at the same time.

Trending via Instagram:

Did it hurt, when my ice cream outlasted yours?

Just landed via Snapchat:

Tried online dating, and it turns out my soulmate is a Nigerian prince who needs my bank details to escape his kingdom.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I love how we didn’t raise the minimum wage because it would make food more expensive, but then just made the food more expensive anyway.

Going viral on Reddit:

Gonna tell my dentist that if I’m late, he should start without me.

Making waves on Discord:

You should be allowed to leave work early if you miss your wife enough.

Spotted on WeChat:

If you think I’m annoying, give it some time. You’ll know for sure pretty soon.

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