All these deadlines, but it’s you I want to meet.

All these deadlines, but it’s you I want to meet.

Commentary:
🤣 "Who needs deadlines when you can have datelines with the special someone? Love knows no bounds, not even the constraints of time 😂💘⏰"

Petition to make weekends longer. Two days isn’t enough.

Petition to make weekends longer. Two days isn’t enough.

Commentary:
"Seriously, who do we talk to about extending weekends? It's like we blink and it's already Monday again! 🙈 Can we get a petition going for #MoreWeekendPlease? 📝⏳"

It’s healthy to be a little insane sometimes.

It’s healthy to be a little insane sometimes.

Commentary:
"Embrace your inner craziness… it's the secret ingredient to a balanced diet of madness! 🤪🥗 #HealthyInsanity"

My favorite yoga pose is reaching for the remote control on the far end of the table without falling off the couch.

My favorite yoga pose is reaching for the remote control on the far end of the table without falling off the couch.

Commentary:
Ah, the elusive 'Couch Potato' pose – a true test of flexibility and balance for those of us dedicated to the ancient art of TV watching 🧘‍♂️🛋️ Remember, it's all about finding inner peace… and the right channel!

Half of Twitter is horny, half is depressed and the other half don’t know how to do math.

Half of Twitter is horny, half is depressed and the other half don’t know how to do math.

Commentary:
"So basically, Twitter is a place where 150% of people exist… 🤔. It's a mathematically challenged, emotionally volatile bonanza! Who said you can't be horny, depressed, and bad at math all at the same time? Twitter says otherwise! 🤣 #TwitterLogic"

If you’re a mad scientist, put a note in your laboratory reminding you to sometimes be a happy scientist.

If you’re a mad scientist, put a note in your laboratory reminding you to sometimes be a happy scientist.

Commentary:
"Even mad scientists need a little reminder to sprinkle some happiness in their potions! 🧪✨ Let's add a dash of joy and a pinch of laughter to the experiment, shall we? 🔬😄"

Quitting my job to focus on watching YouTube.

Quitting my job to focus on watching YouTube.

Commentary:
"Decided to follow my passion and pursue a career in professional video-watching 📺💼 Say goodbye to deadlines and hello to endless cat videos! 🐱 #NewJobWhoDis"

Will someone please make me drink some water and limit my screen time?

Will someone please make me drink some water and limit my screen time?

Commentary:
"Ah, the eternal struggle of hydration vs. screen addiction 🌊📱 Who needs self-control when you have Netflix, am I right? 😜 Someone pass me a water bottle and a remote, stat! 💦📺"

My burning question is who thought a two day weekend would suffice the human body.

My burning question is who thought a two day weekend would suffice the human body.

Commentary:
"Whoever thought a two-day weekend was enough clearly missed the memo on the infinite possibilities of naps and Netflix binges 🛌📺 Don't worry, we've got your back – let's start a petition for a seven-day weekend! 🙌😂"