458 Funny family quotes

• My favorite part of parenting is when the kids are bored enough to entertain themselves, but getting to that point is excruciating.

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  11 hours ago

  bored, boredom, enough, entertain, entertainment, family, family life, favorite, getting, humor, kid, kid boredom, kids, life, parenting, patience, point, self, self entertainment

• Telling my parents they’re like family to me.

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  11 hours ago

  family, humor, me, parent, parents, relationship, sarcasm, telling

• My southern family thinks my daily routine in NYC is that I wake up, try really hard not to get stabbed by a knife, and then I go see a musical.

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  12 hours ago

  city, city life, daily, daily routine, entertainment, family, hard, humor, i, knife, life, musical, NYC, routine, southern, southern family, stabbed, stabbing, stereotype, try, wake

• One day I’ll have a sassy, know-it-all daughter, and my husband will say, “She got that from you,” and I can’t wait.

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  13 hours ago

  daughter, day, family, got, humor, husband, i, know-it-all, parenting, personality, personality traits, Sassy, say, traits, wait

• The words I can’t wait to hear someday, “I’m sorry, Mom, you were right about everything.”

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  14 hours ago

  apology, everything, family, hear, humor, i, mom, parent, patience, realization, right, someday, sorry, truth, wait, words

• (To my coworker that’s a year younger than me) You’re like a son to me.

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  14 hours ago

  age, coworker, family, humor, joke, me, son, workplace, year, younger

• You will see blonder children than you would ever think possible at expensive ice cream parlours.

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  16 hours ago

  activity, blonde, blonde child, child, children, cream, ever, expensive, family, family outing, humor, ice, ice cream parlour, observation, outing, parlour, summer, summer activity, think

• I regret to inform you that we must all once again figure out what to make for dinner tonight.

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  16 hours ago

  again, cooking, daily, daily routine, decision, decision making, dinner, family, family life, figure, food, humor, i, inform, life, making, meal, meal planning, once, planning, regret, routine, tonight

• Let’s get married and have kids, so instead of relaxing during weeknights, we can go to seven practices and relearn algebra.

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  17 hours ago

  algebra, family, family life, humor, kid, kids, life, marriage, married, parenting, practice, relaxation, relaxing, weeknight

• This family has a lot of nerve wearing all these clothes after I just did laundry.

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  17 hours ago

  after, clothes, family, household, humor, i, just, laundry, lot, nerve, sarcasm

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