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77 Funny friends quotes

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  • Hit the vape till it tastes like technology.

    Commentary:
    “When your vape starts speaking binary code, you know you’ve entered the Matrix! 💨🤖🤣”

  • You know you’re getting old when you and the grocery store have the same playlist.

    Commentary:
    “Guess it’s time to face the music 🎶… and maybe pick up some kale while I’m at it! 🥬😂”

  • If you’re feeling lonely, start a small business. Then you’ll have a little company.

    Commentary:
    “When life gives you loneliness, build a company—instant friends with a side of stress! 💼🤣📈”

  • Wife is temporary. Being the hot EX is forever.

    Commentary:
    “When life gives you lemons, make your ex regret it! 🍋🔥😎 #GlowUp”

  • I like when I walk with people and they note that I’m a fast walker. We’re in a race. We’re in a race and you’re losing actually.

    Commentary:
    “When you’re in the Walking Olympics and nobody told your friend 😂🏃‍♂️🏅 #CatchMeIfYouCan”

  • Ain’t no girls in my messages, just a bunch of verification codes.

    Commentary:
    “When even your phone’s more concerned about security than your love life! 😂🔐📲 #ForeverVerified”

  • Parents will give you a lecture about fake friends and then get scammed by their own siblings.

    Commentary:
    “When your parents are experts in spotting fake friends but get bamboozled by Aunt Karen 🤦‍♂️😂 #FamilyDrama #PlotTwist” 🌟👀

  • Holding this fart in feels like I’m pregnant with a dinosaur.

    Commentary:
    “When life hands you a meteor, give birth to a T-Rex! 🦖💨😂”

  • Stop worrying if people like you. They don’t.

    Commentary:
    “Finally, a problem I can check off the list! 😂👍 #StressFree”

  • Breaking up is fine, but logging me out of your Netflix is crazy.

    Commentary:
    “That’s just Netflix betrayal! 😱🍿 #KeepThePasswordLove”

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