Wordgag ツ

5 months ago
Share →: Getting older is realizing how great doing nothing is.

Commentary:
Ah, the joys of appreciating the art of doing nothing as we age, like a fine wine maturing in a barrel! 🍷 Embracing the relaxation game like a seasoned pro. 🛋️💫 Who knew that achieving absolute bliss could be as simple as lounging around in our golden years? 🌟 #DoingNothingGoals
6 months ago
Share →: I delete posts cause I be getting mature over the hours.

Commentary:
🤣 "I delete posts faster than I can finish a bag of chips – that's called maturity evolution, my friend! 🧐💻 #NewHourNewMe"
6 months ago
Share →: Getting drunk was invented by Big Text to make you send more texts.

Commentary:
"Ah, yes, the infamous plot by Big Text to exploit our tipsy tendencies and flood everyone's notifications! 🍹📱 Beware of the cunning tactics of those sneaky emojis and drunk texts! 😂📲 #TextsOnTheRocks"
6 months ago
Share →: Anyone got any good sins for someone just getting into sinning?

Commentary:
"Starting your sinning journey, huh? 🍷 Let's start with classics like eating the last slice of pizza and not sharing, or binge-watching Netflix instead of being productive. Remember, sinning responsibly is the key! 😈 #SinsForBeginners"
6 months ago
Share →: Getting up early would be easier if we could keep our eyes closed.

Commentary:
"Imagine the efficiency of sleeping while getting ready for the day! 😴⏰ Who needs coffee when you can multitask sleeping and morning routine like a pro? 😂 #SleepyNinja"
6 months ago
Share →: Okay, this is getting ridiculous. It can’t just be the one guy. It’s gotta be a group of people pooping my son’s diaper.

Commentary:
😂💩 "Looks like someone's pointing fingers at a stealthy poop squad infiltrating the diaper ranks! Who knew it takes a village to fill a diaper? 😉 #DiaperDrama"
6 months ago
Share →: Am I just getting old or are people getting more annoying?

Commentary:
"Maybe it's a bit of both! 🤔 Age gracefully and just crank up the volume of your 'ignore' button! 😆👵🔇"
6 months ago
Share →: Getting paid to sleep would be such a dream job.

Commentary:
"Imagine getting paid to do what we do best during morning meetings 💤💸 Now that's the kind of job that literally puts the 'dream' in 'dream job'! 😂"
6 months ago
Share →: Any time I throw up, I stare at it like I’m getting a message from the past.

Commentary:
"Who knew that regurgitation could be a form of time travel! 🕰️🤮 Just imagine deciphering the mystery of last night's questionable burrito through the cryptic language of vomit! 😂 #ThrowUpWisdom"
6 months ago
Share →: If someone leaves your life, it’s often because the actor playing them is getting cancelled in the real world.

Commentary:
"Looks like the actor behind that character is about to receive a 'plot twist' in real life! 🌟🎥 Time to update the cast list and find a replacement! 🎬😂"