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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

Before I start seeing a psychiatrist, does anyone like me crazy?

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

Everyone talks about climate change, but no one has the courage to sacrifice a virgin to appease the gods.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

My dog is quite vain. Whenever the doorbell rings, he thinks it’s for him.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

People drive you insane and then say “see, I told you that you’re insane.”

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

Pirate: walks the plank. Someone’s dad: Is this teak?

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

Sometimes when I’m having a particularly stressful day, I take a pregnancy test to remind myself that at least one thing in my life is still going as planned.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

If you inject Botox into a raisin, does it turn back into a grape?

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

Unlike the stomach, the brain doesn’t alert you when it’s empty.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

Nobody is more stressed than a person who has a lot of interests or passions and is still confused about their career.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

There are too many movies about vampire hunters and not enough about vampire gatherers.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

831 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,993

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,993

Updated

5 hours ago

Users Online

3,451

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Instagram:

I need a vaccine against overthinking.

Spotted on Telegram:

Cinderella was a mess. I mean, I have bad taste in men, but at least I never settled for a guy who couldn’t remember what my face looked like.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

You don’t scare me, you’re not my kid noticing her sibling got a bigger slice of cake.

Shared recently on Discord:

People really be like, “I would never do that to you,” and then do it with a remix.

Just shared via Instagram:

Donating blood today to make room for more food.

Live now on Discord:

Blocking me is like blocking the sun, the moon and the stars.

Going viral on Discord:

Dear people, who drive without music playing, what do you do with your brain?

Trending via Discord:

I’m already excited about who I’m going to think sucks first today.

Going viral on X:

Men with bibles names be the worst type of people.

Just shared via Twitch:

Why is it called Christian community and not Holyfans?

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

831 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,993

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,993

Updated

5 hours ago

Users Online

3,432

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

The 10 minutes I spend on my mobile before I go to sleep are the best 3 hours of my day.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

My milkshakes bring all the bots to the yard.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has bookmarked:

Guys have good pics on their dating profiles because their ex took them.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

“I asked Grok.” “I asked ChatGPT.” Well, I’ve sacrificed a sheep.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

Defeating imposter syndrome by actually being incompetent.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

Just saw two identical twins out in public together. No disrespect to that lifestyle but please keep it private.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

You’re in her DMs, she’s in my bed whining that it’s too cold. Can you come get her?

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

I’ll make you feel safe in that you’ll know you can outrun me if we are being chased by a murderer.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

The first 7 days of the week aren’t for me.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

My goal is to do one thing each day that could prevent me from being elected to political office.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Pinterest:

Eternal Sunshine of the Thotless Grind.

Trending via Messenger:

I just wish I had the confidence of my husband who thinks everything only takes 5 minutes.

Trending via Facebook:

Once again, I was not nominated for an Oscar this morning for acting my way through life.

Shared recently on X:

Life is what happens in between trips to the fridge.

Just shared via Telegram:

Cheeseburgers should be free for anyone that’s in a bad mood.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

The older you get, the farther away your toenails are when they need a trim.

Going viral on Twitch:

I wish I could have a kid just to see what it looks like… and then put it back.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

It’s a good thing that our phones only convey sight and sound. No offense, but from most of you I would never want to receive a smelfie!

Trending via Snapchat:

The real threat to Democracy is the Bureaucracy.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

My dream is to buy a horse and race it. The horse will probably beat me but it’ll still be fun.

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