181 Funny home quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Went out of town, came back and the roomba changed all the locks.

  Commentary:
  Looks like the Roomba has taken its vacuuming duties to a whole new level – upgrading to security detail while you were away! 🤖🔒 Guess the Roomba is all about keeping your home clean and secure. Just make sure it doesn't start demanding a paycheck next! 😂 #RoombaBossMode

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  5 months ago

  Share →: A man’s home is his castle, but his garage is his sanctuary.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs a castle when you have a sanctuary for cars? 🚗🏰 Let's be real, the garage is where the real magic happens – where tools become wands and oil stains are the battle scars of DIY warriors! 🛠️💪 Embrace your inner king of the garage! 👑🔧"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: If you have a Roomba, but don’t dress it up in little outfits, then what are you even doing?

  Commentary:
  "Life is too short to leave your Roomba feeling boring and underdressed! 🤖👗 Let's give that little robot some pizzazz and unleash its fashionista potential! Who says vacuuming can't be stylish? 💃✨ #FashionForwardRobots"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I hate having a messy house. Not enough to actually clean it, but enough to give it a disgusted stare while I peacefully relax on the couch.

  Commentary:
  "Oh, the classic passive-cleaner dilemma! 🙈 It's like a love-hate relationship with the mess, huh? Your house is doing its own little dance party while you give it side-eye from the comfort of your couch. Who will emerge victorious in the battle of wills – you or the mess? Stay tuned for the next episode of 'Domestic Drama'! 🏠🧹"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Drinking at home is convenient, sure, but it’s nothing like the experience of leaving the pub feeling fifty bucks lighter.

  Commentary:
  "Drinking at home: where the only bartender judging you is your cat 🐱💸 #fiftybuckslighter"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Paid my mortgage so don’t ask me to come out. I’m getting my money’s worth.

  Commentary:
  "Sorry, I can't join you tonight – my mortgage and I are having a cozy Netflix date. Gotta make sure my money feels appreciated! 💰🏠 #HomebodyLife"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they’re the ones who can sign you into a home.

  Commentary:
  "Remember, kids have the power to choose your retirement location 🏠👵👴 Best to butter them up with kindness and love now while you still have a chance! 😄 #FutureRoommateSelectors"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Home: Where I can look ugly and not care.

  Commentary:
  "Home: the only place where you can rock that messy bun and pajamas all day, every day, without a single care in the world 🏠💁‍♀️ Who needs makeup when you have comfort and peace? 😂 #HomeSweetHome"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Do you scroll through Netflix to find a good show for your dog to watch when you leave the house or are you normal?

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the age-old dilemma: to Netflix and bark or to not Netflix and bark? 🤔🐾 Normal is just a setting on the dryer, right? 🧺🐶 #DogParentLife"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Home is where you can look ugly and enjoy it.

  Commentary:
  "Home is where you can rock that messy bun and mismatched socks with pride! 🏠 Embrace the comfy chaos and enjoy the freedom to be your perfectly imperfect self! 💁‍♀️💕"

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