Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

I live in constant fear of being asked to repeat what you just said after I say I’m listening.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

If I go quiet, it’s because I am plotting my escape or your demise.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

You know the trouble with real life? There’s no danger music.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

Bad news. Right now is as young as you’re going to be.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

I mean, sex is all right, but have you ever experienced the sheer sensuality of having rock-solid proof that a problem at work was someone else’s fault, even though it really, really looked like it was yours?

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

I could never be an Instagram mom influencer. For starters, I wouldn’t be able to give my kids a name like Banjo or Parmesan or Chandelier.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

The Cranberries. Great band name. You pick a fruit and you get to work.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

I’m in a comfy dress today, but I look like a potato in floral. Call me Nelly Flortato.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

I lied, I’m jealous. I hope every girl who looks at you gets clipped by a meteor.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

Let’s ruin each other’s sleep schedules and call it romance.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,479

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Snapchat:

My plan is to die young as late as possible.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

I get all the cardio I need by running out of patience.

Seen just now on Discord:

I’d change my name to laundry if it meant you’d think about doing me every day.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Youngest siblings are literally weaponized incompetence, final boss.

Live now on Pinterest:

An escape room, but it’s a bean bag chair in a hammock on a water bed in a bouncy house and you’re over 40. Good luck!

Just shared via TikTok:

A collective orgasm would fix the world.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Why do I gotta dress for success? Maybe success could be the one who puts a little more into this relationship.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

If idiots could fly, TikTok would be an airport.

Just landed via Facebook:

Nothing humbles me faster than my phone camera accidentally turning on.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Sundries sounds like something grandma would call scandalous underwear.

Funny makers quotes

Funny makers quotes bring a burst of laughter and creativity to your day 🎨😂 Whether you’re crafting, building, or just making magic happen, these witty words will spark joy and inspiration ✂️✨ Get ready to smile, giggle, and maybe even snort as you dive into the clever humor that only true makers can appreciate! 🛠️🤣 #CreativeLaughs #MakerLife

New funny makers quotes 👇

All funny makers quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

32 shares on Reddit this month:

A gender-neutral equivalent of ‘sugar daddy’ is glucose guardian.

56 shares on Discord this month:

You’ll pay good money to hear a comedian say something offensive, but when I say it for free, I’m the bad guy.

14 shares on Messenger this month:

Source? Divine intuition, gut instinct, and cryptic symbolism from my dreams.

95 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Are people born with photographic memories or do they take time to develop?

62 shares on Facebook this month:

Shoutout to Netflix for being the only one that checks in on me every few hours. “Are you still watching?” Yeah, babe, thank you for asking.

88 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I suffer from that syndrome where your neutral expression makes it look like you’re an angry serial killer.

11 shares on Messenger this month:

Going to the bathroom at night with my flashlight on and a dog next to me feels like I’m gonna solve a mystery.

14 shares on Reddit this month:

I become someone I don’t recognize when I play Monopoly.

14 shares on Telegram this month:

Of course I intermittently fast. That’s when I sleep.

45 shares on Telegram this month:

Show me in the employee handbook where it says I can’t make weird noises in my cubicle.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

5 folks are currently checking 👀

The role I play at family gatherings is that of the cousin that doesn’t show up anymore.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

(Most depressed guy you’ve ever met) I’m doing pretty good.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

They say we learn from our mistakes. That’s why I’m making as many as possible… I’ll be a genius soon.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Just when you’ve built some confidence that you’re a smarter than average human, universe sends you captcha.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

The only hot singles in my area are in my wallet.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m at a place in my life when errands are starting to count as going out.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

No one told me adulthood would require this much multi-factor authentication.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I will selflessly protect my family from a life of diabetes by eating all the sweets myself.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I really think my coworkers and I deserve an Oscar for acting like everything at work is fine.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Seems like the mosquitoes swiped right on me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,253

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

Yes, I was behind the DJ booth, but only as a cultural anthropologist.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

I’m not alone. I have ants.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

Be bold, be italic, but never regular.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

Life update: it’s getting worse.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

“We will go ahead and make these changes if we don’t hear from you before Friday” is such an elegant way to solve problems.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

If I was an elephant, you’d all be sorry.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

I feel like a credit card, cause I’m constantly being used irresponsibly.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

There aren’t any emojis that really express any meaningful sort of anguish.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

The day they handed out patience, I left because it was taking too long.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

Being sleepy all day is just part of who I am.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Instagram:

I don’t always say something stupid. But when I do, I keep talking and make it worse.

Trending via Snapchat:

Anyone who doesn’t like me snoring, doesn’t deserve me moaning either.

Going bananas on Twitch:

Restaurant toilets are dangerous! So many of my dates have gone to use them and vanished.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Schedule your appointment early in the month before your dentist starts fretting about their next boat payment.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Yes, liquor store clerk, I do need help. But I decided to come here instead.

Just shared via Discord:

And for my next trick, I will turn yesterday’s sweatpants into today’s sweatpants.

Going viral on X:

The only lesson I remember from the pandemic is that you’re only supposed to wash your hands if it’s your birthday.

Going viral on Messenger:

“I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked my mom.

Shared recently on Twitch:

People moaning and making noise over food makes me so livid I can’t keep it in.

Just shared via X:

Teens be like, “You know that crumbled up piece of paper that’s been on the table all week? I need it for school.”

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴