Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: Nice tots you got there. Be a shame if someone tatered em.

Commentary:
"Those tater tots better watch out, looks like trouble ahead! 🥔😄 Stay crispy, little tots!"
6 months ago
Share →: Kids be like: “Nice bathroom mirror. It would be a shame if I spat toothpaste all over it.”

Commentary:
Oh, the audacity of kids and their toothpaste art 🤦‍♂️🦷 It's like they see a mirror as a blank canvas just begging for some minty fresh décor! 🖼️😂 #ParentingLife
6 months ago
Share →: You gotta separate the art from the artist. Like, for example, sometimes the artist is really nice but their art sucks.

Commentary:
🎨 When the artist is sweeter than a candy store but their art leaves you feeling sour 🍬😜 It's like getting a hug from a unicorn with bad breath – you appreciate the gesture, but maybe keep your distance from the masterpiece! 🦄🖌️ #ArtisticDilemmas
6 months ago
Share →: I’m actually quite nice. If I had friends, they’d all confirm that.

Commentary:
"Oh, you're 'quite nice,' huh? 🤔 Sounds like a classic case of 'If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?' But hey, who needs friends when you've got such a sparkling personality, right? 😄🌟"
6 months ago
Share →: Jewelry stores should just be like: Whether you’re trying to be nice or trying to get laid, we got you covered.

Commentary:
"Jewelry stores: Where you can conveniently express both your good intentions and your…not-so-subtle intentions 😏💎 #CoveringAllBases"

Fun Fact or Trivia:
Did you know that diamonds are not only a girl's best friend but also a symbol of love and commitment? 💍✨ In ancient India, diamonds were believed to possess mystical powers and were used in battle to protect warriors! ⚔️💎 Whether for romance or friendship, these sparkling gems have always had a special place in hearts and history! ❤️💖
6 months ago
Share →: Just spoke to my wife while the internet was down. She seems nice. She’s a nurse apparently.

Commentary:
Well, well, well, looks like the internet outage brought you some unexpected news! 😆 Who knew you were living with a mysterious nurse all this time? Maybe your wife picked up a side gig while the internet was on a break! 🏥💻 Hope you enjoy getting to know her better now that the connection is back up!
6 months ago
Share →: If you’re out shopping today, be nice to retail workers. It’s not their fault you waited until Marys waters broke before you started your shopping.

Commentary:
"Remember folks, retail workers are not miracle workers! 🙄 Next time, maybe start your shopping a tad earlier than waiting for Mary's waters to break. Just a thought! 😂 #BeKindToRetailWorkers"
6 months ago
Share →: My attempts to purge my possessions always seem to result in me rediscovering that I have lots of nice things, after which I lie happily on my hoard like a dragon.

Commentary:
"Trying to declutter is like embarking on a quest to slay the dragon of excess…only to end up cuddling with it instead 🐉✨ Who knew that hoarding could be so cozy and comforting? #DragonDenDeclutterFail"
6 months ago
Share →: “I thought it might be nice to go around the room and have everyone introduce themselves, including a fun fact.” You thought wrong.

Commentary:
Oh, the dreaded moment when the "fun fact" request strikes fear into the hearts of introverts everywhere! 🙈 Let's be real, nothing brings a group of strangers together quite like the collective eye-rolling that follows this suggestion. 😂 Who knew a simple icebreaker could inspire such levels of panic and creative exaggeration? So, let's spare ourselves the agony and skip right to the good stuff, shall we? 🎉
6 months ago
Share →: If I win the lottery, I’m buying four politicians and some really nice shoes.

Commentary:
"If I win the lottery, I'm buying four politicians and some really nice shoes. 🤑💼 Because sometimes you need to dress up the chaos with a touch of style and a sprinkle of power! 💸👠 #LifeGoals"