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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

Perks of being a girl: You can think about whatever you want in public without worrying about boners.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

She took all my money, called me fat, AND stabbed me in the arm. I hate doctor appointments.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

If you love someone, let them sleep.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

All of my problems boil down to me being bad at being alive.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

I get it, credit cards, I’ve reached my limit too.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

My toxic trait is thinking I deserve a break after sending one email.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

When you wish you could tell someone that won’t stop talking “Okay, we’re out of time today”, just like a therapist.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

It’s interesting growing up and discovering that most adults are not that clever. I had my suspicions as a kid but I didn’t think the situation was this dire.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Pinterest recipe so long that it’s now a limited series on Netflix.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

My favorite military tradition is asking someone what an acronym means right after they use it, and they don’t know what it means.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Jan 2, 2026

3,431

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

Having a job is cool, but everyday? Come on!

Broadcasted on TikTok:

When I like a woman, I start to gather gifts for her like a squirrel hoarding nuts.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I need an Apple Watch that tracks when my patience runs out.

Trending via Threads:

My mom didn’t raise a fool. Possibly a psycho, but never a fool.

Trending via Telegram:

I can’t be the only person who thinks the presidential debate should be performed as a rap battle.

Trending via X:

Sorry, can’t. I’m too busy growing new neural pathways to make space for a stranger’s opinion. Evolution takes bandwidth, man.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Good luck to everyone out there trying to gather enough energy to function this week.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Have nothing to say, I just wanted to appear in your newsfeed.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Speed dating, but it’s just me changing tables at a restaurant every few minutes trying a bite of everyone’s food.

Going viral on Threads:

“I’m not concerned about Netflix buying Warner Brothers. None of this will matter once we evolve gills and start living underwater.”

12 Funny signals quotes

Funny signals quotes 🚦😂 are the perfect way to decode life’s little mishaps with a smile! Whether it’s awkward texts, mixed messages, or those “wait, what?” moments, these witty lines turn confusion into comedy. Ready to laugh at the chaos of communication? Let’s dive into some hilarious takes that’ll have you nodding and chuckling all at once! 📱🤣✨

New funny signals quotes 👇

Male barista called me “my love” yesterday and didn’t say it today… getting mixed signals and feeling really upset.

0

3 weeks ago

barista, called, coffee, coffee shop, feeling, getting, humor, interaction, love, male, me, mixed, mixed signal, nickname, say, shop, signal, signals, today, upset, yesterday
Mixed signals mean they don’t like you like that. It’s that simple.

0

2 months ago

communication, dating, dislike, love, mean, mixed, mixed signal, rejection, relationship, signal, signals, simple
Some of you are out here driving like your turn signal’s free trial ended and you’re all out of blinks.

0

2 months ago

blinks, driving, free, free trial, here, humor, road, road safety, safety, signal, signals, traffic, trial, turn, turn signal
Hey girl, do you like my signals? I mixed them myself.

0

2 months ago

flirtation, girl, humor, i, line, mixed, myself, pick-up, pick-up line, signals
Good luck sending me mixed signals. Most the time I can’t even understand the direct ones.

0

2 months ago

communication, confusion, direct, direct signals, good, humor, i, luck, me, mixed, mixed signals, relationships, sarcasm, signals, time, understanding
Please don’t send me mixed signals, I don’t even understand the clear ones.

0

2 months ago

clear, clear signals, communication, confusion, dating, even, humor, i, me, misunderstanding, mixed, mixed signals, please, relationships, send, signals, understand
I thought my mixed signals were perfectly clear.

0

2 months ago

clarity, clear, communication, expectations, humor, i, misunderstanding, mixed, mixed signal, perfectly, relationship, signal, signals, thought
Mr. Mixed Signals decided he likes me today.

0

2 months ago

confusion, dating, humor, likes, me, mixed, mixed signals, relationship, signals, today
Welcome to downtown where the crosswalk signals are merely suggestions and you hope the puddles are water.

0

2 months ago

city, city life, crosswalk, downtown, hope, humor, life, puddle, sarcasm, signals, suggestions, water, welcome, where
I may not understand women, but cheeseburgers have never sent me mixed signals, and for that they’ll always have my heart.

0

2 months ago

always, cheeseburger, food, heart, humor, i, love, me, mixed, mixed signals, relationship, signals, understand, women

For even more funny signals quotes, hit next 👇

All funny signals quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

91 shares on WeChat this month:

Being a people pleaser that no one is pleased with is the main cause of my anxiety.

88 shares on Threads this month:

Sometimes it’s the conversations you have with yourself that take the longest.

67 shares on TikTok this month:

No one tells you that the older you get, the more often you check your weather app.

86 shares on Messenger this month:

Establish dominance by showing up with all your childhood trophies.

74 shares on Messenger this month:

Bro, you’re not allowed anymore to have your tongue drop out of your mouth and form a stair case when you see my wife.

53 shares on Discord this month:

When I gain weight, I should get to designate where on my body it goes.

29 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The reason I don’t trust polls is because the people being polled are people who willingly answer the phone when an unknown number is calling them.

40 shares on Reddit this month:

Your coworker is not hot; they’re just within 10 feet of you 40 hours a week.

72 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m so lazy that I get jealous when it’s bedtime in other countries.

25 shares on YouTube this month:

You look like the kind of person who would hit rock bottom and then start drilling.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Listen to the birds, not the news.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

5pm on a Friday: call me a McDonald’s ice-cream machine because I’m not working.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Ever read something so magnificently stupid that you have to just stare into space for a little while and reconcile with your brain for having been subjected to it?

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Anytime someone comments on my weight, I try to ignore them and keep my chins up.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a crush on someone is just having a lack of information on someone.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t worry, I’m only dead inside from the waist up.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I am cool with January lasting forever because rent is due February 1.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

If anyone needs me, I’ll be in a different realm.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

That’s me in the corner, that’s me using Microsoft Word, losing my revision.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

When the moon hits your eye like it’s 5:45, that’s November.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,636

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

Hired a financial advisor, and his first piece of advice was that I don’t make nearly enough money to justify paying a financial advisor.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

I hate having a body, it’s so high maintenance. Shower this, eat that, drink this, sleep that, it’s all very stupid.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

When they say screen time is bad for you, they just mean the ones at work, right?

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

I will marry a tall, masculine, lovey-dovey man who can’t breathe when I ignore his existence.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

I love when men go on diets they will be like “let me go for the healthy option”: the buffalo chicken quesadilla.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

I did the math and a second job would help me get out of debt as long as I start it twelve years ago.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

Why is adulthood just bills and wondering what to eat?

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

I can’t wait to hit my 80s & run for Congress.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control. I thought to myself, “Wow, this changes everything.”

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

Nightmares are so embarrassing. Why is my anxiety working the night shift?

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Excuse me sir, are you going to finish that existential crisis?

Seen just now on Discord:

I bought some coconut shampoo today. I got halfway home before I thought, “I don’t even have a coconut!”

Just landed via Telegram:

Wednesday is the part of the novel where the heroine stares out the window and questions everything.

Going viral on Facebook:

One day you’re young and carefree and the next, you’re preheating the bathroom before you go in for a shower.

Trending via WhatsApp:

A month in Italy has halved my will to work and doubled my desire for money.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

When I was a kid, I had to walk to Netflix.

Just shared via Threads:

Revenge has no expiry date. I will deal with you when I’m ready.

Trending via Snapchat:

I just love the lack of privacy in the pharmacy line. Just standing there shouting out my name, date of birth, and exactly what is wrong with me for the world to hear.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

They can steal your recipe, but the sauce won’t taste the same.

Making waves on WeChat:

Declined stepping on the scale at the doctor’s office because no one needs that kind of negativity in her life.

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