Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: You ever look at yourself on the self-checkout camera and think, “wow, I better write my will.”

Commentary:
"Self-checkout cameras: turning everyday shopping trips into dramatic episodes of our own lives since forever! 💸📸😱 #SelfieScare #DramaticShopping"
6 months ago
Share →: I like to think of myself as an onion. Peel back the many layers and deep down inside you’ll find a smaller, more anxious onion.

Commentary:
"Peeling back the layers of the human experience is like unearthing an onion… only to discover a world of anxiety hiding within! 🧅😅 Just remember, even the most anxious onions have their own unique flavor to add to the potpourri of life! 🌟 #OnionLayersOfEmotions"
6 months ago
Share →: I’m at an age where, when I’m tying my shoes, I think about what else I can do while I’m down here.

Commentary:
Ah, the multitasking mastery of adulthood! 🧦👟 Why stop at just tying shoes when you can also contemplate the secrets of the universe or solve world hunger, right? 🤔💭 Keep reaching for the stars, even from tying your shoelaces! 🌟👞 #AdultingGoals
6 months ago
Share →: Nobody knows what to do with me and I just think that’s beautiful.

Commentary:
Well, as the saying goes: "Why fit in when you were born to stand out?" 💁‍♀️ Embrace your uniqueness and keep everyone guessing – it's the perfect recipe for a little extra sprinkle of mystery and charm! 🌟✨😄
6 months ago
Share →: I think humans are meant to lay in bed with the love of their life all winter.

Commentary:
"Who needs hibernation when you have love to keep you warm all winter? 😏❤️ Just make sure your significant other doesn't hog the blankets! 🛌🔥 #WinterSnuggles"
6 months ago
Share →: If you think about it, Santa really has the best job, he works one day a year and spends the rest of his time judging people.

Commentary:
🎅🏼🎁📆 "Santa: the ultimate part-time worker and full-time judge. Must be nice to only work one day a year and spend the rest making his list and checking it twice! 😂📝 #SantaClausIsComingToTown"
6 months ago
Share →: Her: how are you still single? Me: it’s easier than you think.

Commentary:
"Her: how are you still single? Me: it's easier than you think. 🤷‍♂️ Maybe I'm just too good at dodging Cupid's arrows! 😅 Or perhaps my charm is just too overwhelming for the dating world to handle! 😏 Who needs a relationship when you've got such a fabulous self, right? 💁‍♂️"
6 months ago
Share →: I actually think it’s quite beautiful that you have to be the one to save yourself.

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old realization that you are your own superhero! 🦸‍♂️ Embrace the power within you to save the day, one self-rescue mission at a time. 💪 Who needs a knight in shining armor when you've got yourself? 😉"
6 months ago
Share →: Breaking news: you’re way less interesting than you think you are.

Commentary:
🚨🤯🎤 "Attention! Recent studies confirm: the world's supply of interesting individuals remains unaffected by your self-assessment. 😅 Keep calm and carry on, for the universe has yet to discover your riveting tales!" 🌍🚀 #HumilityCheck #StayHumble
6 months ago
Share →: I used to think money is everything. I still think money is everything.

Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old wisdom of money… always a hot topic! 💰💸 It seems some things never change, just like the eternal battle between wanting to save money and wanting to spend it all in one go! 😅💸 #MoneyTalks"