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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

Imagine if every time you ate a grape you’d hear a soft voice whisper “that was my son…”

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

I don’t know if I’m pregnant or what, but I’ve been craving 3 million dollars so bad.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

No one talks about how uncomfortable it is to ask for your own money back.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

If I go quiet, it’s because I am plotting my escape or your demise.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

It’s so hot to me when a man has a poorly run Instagram account.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

There should be sympathy cards for having to go back to work after a vacation.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

They should invent something in between coffee and narcotics.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

Alcohol and eye contact is a deadly combo.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

Girlfriend is temporary, ex-girlfriend is forever.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

The females who don’t go through phones will definitely find out through dreams.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,470

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on YouTube:

Just told my cat I’d give her 500 bucks to stop meowing.

Going viral on Discord:

This Thanksgiving, don’t ask me questions about my life, just pass the mashed potatoes.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Someone asked me if I had any hobbies and I panicked and said “lasagna”.

Going viral on Telegram:

Cool times create cool guys.

Live now on YouTube:

The children seemed disappointed when I told them the best part about being an adult is going to bed early.

Making waves on Slack:

Took a break from Twitter for my mental health, so I’d figure I’d come back to ruin it again.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Having a crush is so stupid. Like, why is this dude in my head at 8 am?

Making waves on Pinterest:

It’s now socially acceptable again to clap when the plane lands.

Just shared via Facebook:

Play the long game? You mean Monopoly?

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re saying, “What kind of trees are those?”

Funny vs quotes

Funny vs quotes 😂🔥 are the perfect way to add some laughs to your day while dropping truth bombs! Whether you’re poking fun at healthy competition or just love clever comebacks, these witty lines bring humor and sass in equal measure. Ready to spice up your conversations and social feeds with some playful banter? Let’s dive into the funniest face-offs and verbal showdowns that’ll have you LOL-ing nonstop! 🎉🗣️✨

New funny vs quotes 👇

All funny vs quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

82 shares on Snapchat this month:

Why sleep when you can stay up all night overthinking?

15 shares on X this month:

If you’re reading this, drink some water. You’re not a cactus.

64 shares on Reddit this month:

If by ‘leg day’ you mean a day that we put your legs on my shoulders, then yes, I love leg day.

49 shares on Messenger this month:

The cool side of the pillow just stole my boyfriend.

11 shares on Pinterest this month:

I know Jesus was a carpenter, but I think he would’ve been a better plumber, you know, with the water thing.

71 shares on WeChat this month:

All arguments are solvable. The trick? Get naked.

50 shares on Twitch this month:

Good morning to everyone who doesn’t get on my nerves.

33 shares on Snapchat this month:

When younger I would walk up to the counter and the bartender would know me by name. Now it’s my pharmacist.

11 shares on Instagram this month:

There should be a calorie refund for food that didn’t taste as good as you expected.

57 shares on Telegram this month:

You’re supposed to store a treasure in your cleavage that’s why it’s called a chest.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

5 folks are currently checking 👀

It is kind of inspiring that I messed up my life without drugs, gambling or a troubled youth. People really can do anything.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I haven’t given up on my fairy-tale ending. I still plan to be eaten by a wolf.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Dating is so overrated. Let’s just get married.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing betrays your age more than the slang you won’t let go of.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Doggy style is out cat style is in. It’s where I let you touch me until I’m satisfied then ignore you and scratch you if you try and touch me again.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

To me, essential oils are what drips out of tacos.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I was the most patient parent and then I had kids.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Dating apps? No thanks, if I wanted to talk to someone for hours and accomplish nothing, I’d contact tech support.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Watermelon. The fruit that comes with a workout.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Unlike smoking, vaping doesn’t reduce your sex drive. It just reduces the sex drive of the people who see you vaping.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,609

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Age is just a number that you keep off of Facebook after 35.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

I just shaved my legs and man, the next 7 minutes and 34 seconds before it starts growing back is gonna feel amazing.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

I’m sorry I lied to you. I only did it for material gain. And to cause you psychological harm. And to prove I’m smarter than you.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

There are a 100 billions nerves in the human body, and there are people who have the ability to irritate all of them.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

The house from Hansel and Gretel but made out of tacos.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

Word on the street is that the fire in your heart is out.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

Alligators can live up to 100 years which is why there is an increased chance that they will see you later.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

Don’t tell me about your wild weekend. My TV remote died and I switched the batteries around, and now it’s working.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

“Love is in the air.” Wrong. Microplastics.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

Let’s ride this misunderstanding into the sunset.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Twitch:

Dear predictive text, I am tired of sending people “Thanksgiving” when they send me a recipe or directions.

Just landed via Reddit:

Really miss the drama of being able to angrily shut a flip phone.

Just shared via Facebook:

Every time a bird poops on my car, I eat a plate of wings on the front porch to show them what I’m capable of.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Girl, if the moon can block the sun, then you can definitely block your ex.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Are there cheat codes for parenting teenagers? This level is really hard.

Just landed via Slack:

Middle children as adults still trying to get attention because the oldest is being dramatic and the younger child is getting away with everything.

Breaking via WeChat:

Being weird never goes out of style.

Freshly posted on Slack:

There’s no bigger test of patience than typing your email address in on a TV with the remote.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

My hair will never allow me to commit any crime; I leave my DNA everywhere.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

“You should exercise for at least 30 minutes every day”. Okay, and how much if you’re not trying to go to the Olympics?

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