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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

I got a bumper sticker that says, “Honk if you think I’m pretty.” Sometimes I just sit at green lights until I feel better about myself.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

I need to go back to Friday. I want to do my weekend differently.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

Living la vida taco!

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

“Stop bouncing your leg!” It’s either this or I start screaming.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

The dopamine hit of getting an Outlook meeting cancellation is unrivaled.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

My card got declined at the barbershop so they put all the hair in my mouth and squeezed me until it came out of my head.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

My desire to be informed is currently at odds with my desire to remain sane.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

When you realize your punishments as a kid (stay home, take a nap, no junk food, go to bed early) are now your goals as an adult.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

Interviewer: Can I get you anything? Me: Yeah, a job!

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

I’ve heard that some people have kids who sleep through the night and I’d like to know if they use tranquilizers or chloroform.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,701

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WhatsApp:

To accommodate the size of my wife’s new water bottle, we’ve replaced the passenger seat of her car with a cupholder.

Spotted on Threads:

Nothing is smaller than the X on ads to click them away.

Breaking via Messenger:

Don’t forget to whine and complain about Monday today.

Broadcasted on X:

When I hear the word “horror”, the first thing I think of is bills, not Halloween.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I got one brain cell left and it moves around my head like a Windows screensaver.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Romance level: At some point, someone comes by, sees me and thinks: “Oh well, my God, why not?”

Trending via Snapchat:

wearing no bra and oversized clothes is self-care at its finest

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Onion rings? I’m answering.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

This can’t be the same brain I was using to read 750-page novels in 3 days during middle school.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Mr. Beast is like if they made Dubai into a person.

Home » Funny Website Quotes

22 Funny website quotes

Funny website quotes are the perfect way to add a splash of humor 😂 and personality to any page! Whether you’re aiming to make visitors chuckle 🤣 or just lighten the mood 😜, these witty lines bring charm and smiles in seconds. Ready to turn your site into a laughter zone? Let’s dive into the world of clever, quirky, and downright hilarious web gems! 🎉💻✨

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Social Media Stars ⭐

31 shares on Messenger this month:

When is this robot army coming to take my job?

97 shares on Threads this month:

If I had just one hour left to live, I’d spend it in Math class… it never ends.

90 shares on Telegram this month:

Asking my dentist a question, but sticking my fingers in his mouth before he replies.

72 shares on Slack this month:

You ever look at yourself on the self-checkout camera and think, “wow, I better write my will.”

65 shares on Facebook this month:

I have decided to purchase the grocery store because it is now cheaper than the groceries inside it.

94 shares on Facebook this month:

Gonna end every insult with “but in a good way”.

13 shares on WeChat this month:

Like a fine bourbon, we get better with age. Or, at least, … we feel better about our age after drinking lots of bourbon!

22 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Best thing about staying in an Airbnb is trying to see what’s in that one locked closet.

46 shares on Instagram this month:

Nobody knows what to do with me and I just think that’s beautiful.

86 shares on X this month:

The older I get, the more I hate making extra stops after work. I drive home like I’m late for the house.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m at the age where I won’t make eye contact with someone because they look like a “talker.”

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The problem with believing that nothing matters except you, is that eventually everyone will just leave you alone to take extra special care of yourself.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

My five-year plan is to just see what happens.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Hey, I noticed you’re not saying what I want.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

If I were you, I would rather be me.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Either you’re violently frolicking with me or you’re violently frolicking against me.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Dogs have two jobs: calm their humans when they are stressed. Stress their humans when they are calm.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I love routine. Until I’m bored, then I love excitement. Until I’m overwhelmed, then I love routine.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Maybe in another life, I’m a spoiled nepo baby — jobless and doing nothing but shopping all day with my equally nepotised friends.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes the voices in my head get bullied by the voices in my stomach.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,952

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

You don’t scare me. You’re not a parking garage that I can’t figure out how to get out of.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

Just cleaned my room in case Beyoncé was somewhere close to my house and her car broke down, and she needed somewhere to sleep.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

First rule for the new year is to not dwell on what went wrong this year.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

The thing about being 50+ is that whenever an opportunity to pee is available – you’re wise to take it.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

There should be a variant of fencing with two guys trying to kiss one another.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

Only mosquitoes find me attractive. Nobody else.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

Tonight I wanted to stop drinking but then I remembered the owner of the pub has a family to feed.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

One does not simply become a master of karate. First, you must accidentally walk into a spider web.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

Just saw the fattest bird. This guy must get up early as hell.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

The dopamine hit of getting an Outlook meeting cancellation is unrivaled.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via YouTube:

My mouth moves faster than my survival instincts.

Just landed via Reddit:

“You’re a flirt!” God forbid a girl has good communication skills.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.

Live now on LinkedIn:

This pillow isn’t going to scream into itself.

Making waves on Facebook:

Instead of cleaning my house, I just watch episodes of hoarders on TV and then I think “Wow, my house looks awesome!”

Spotted on Slack:

Everybody looks like a criminal on the self-checkout camera.

Trending via X:

I’m tired of pretending talking about the weather isn’t fun.

Just shared via Messenger:

Writing cover letters feels soooo “Ever since I was a little boy, I knew I wanted to be an administrative assistant when I grew up.”

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Hey! Remember in the first grade when we were all just chilling and then some kid would throw up out of nowhere?

Going viral on Reddit:

Foolproof? Yeah, well we’ll see about that.

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