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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

My dog and I play this game, it’s called “What Are You Chewing On Now?” It goes both ways.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

*Googles: How to fake your own death and erase existence before 9am Monday morning.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

I wonder if Van Halen realized they were writing music just to lift weights to.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

Calling it a situationship, and the whole time, the situation is that they don’t want you.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

My therapist is so lucky. I’m like a Netflix Original that pays her to watch.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

I’m so smart, I got rid of cable and now I only have $638 in monthly streaming services.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

I’m so jealous of people who live near a coastal area. What do you mean you can just go to the beach on a random Tuesday?

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

They get real weird at the gun store if you walk in crying and asking for “the biggest one”.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

Harmonicas are basically for people who like to hear music while they spit.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

Accessories can really boost a woman’s self-confidence. For example, I know I would feel 10x sexier if I carried a sword with me at all times.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

758 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,920

Funny Quotes Topics

13,890

Funny Quotes Images

10,920

50 minutes ago

3,422

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WhatsApp:

Most puns make me feel numb, but math puns make me feel number.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Seems like being an asshole is a full-time job for some.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I hate it when I take a picture of myself and see 20 years of bad eating habits and no exercise.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Life would be so much easier if you could push a button that makes dickheads fall through a trap door in the floor.

Going viral on Facebook:

“You’re a cougar!” God forbid a woman gives back to the youth.

Live now on WeChat:

My favorite color is money.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I don’t know how to explain it, but sometimes cheese just falls into my cart at the grocery store.

Making waves on X:

The biggest lesson employment has taught me is that efficient workers get punished with more work.

Spotted on Facebook:

The older I get, the more I treat birthdays like one night stands and just pretend they didn’t happen.

Going viral on Threads:

Ironically, the Internet was invented to save time.

Outlook just asked me if I’m “enjoying” Microsoft Outlook. As if it’s not the Torment Portal.

6 months ago

Outlook just asked me if I’m “enjoying” Microsoft Outlook. As if it’s not the Torment Portal.

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Commentary:
"Outlook, the eternal questioner, daring to ask if anyone actually enjoys its chaotic charm. 🤔 More like the Torment Portal – where each click is a journey into the abyss of never-ending emails and calendar reminders! 😅 #OutlookStruggles"

enjoying, enjoyment, frustration, humor, just, me, microsoft, outlook, portal, sarcasm, software, torment, work

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

758 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,920

Funny Quotes Topics

13,890

Funny Quotes Images

10,920

50 minutes ago

3,427

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

The best part of the relationship is before you meet them, and you’re single.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

This meeting could have been a cake.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

What is rizz if not swag persevering?!

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

I have no idea how people meet at the gym. I turn into a disgusting, angry swamp witch every time I exercise.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

They should make the last foot of dental floss red so you know when you’re about to run out.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

“Do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life.” Yeah, because I won’t be leaving my bed.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

Not to brag, but I can put my socks on without sitting down.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Typos keep me humble. Every email is a gamble.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

Everything is 10 times funnier when you are supposed to be quiet.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

You should always wear a helmet when doing dangerous things or talking about politics.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Telegram:

Getting money from the Tooth Fairy is a gateway drug to organ trafficking.

Trending via Slack:

Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Make it worse by saying they look tired.

Spotted on Discord:

I don’t understand how I can remember every word of a song from 1984, but I can’t remember why I walked into the kitchen.

Just shared via Twitch:

Of course your crush is going to leave their spouse for you. That’s how delusions work.

Going viral on Threads:

If you really think about it, extraordinary isn’t that great. It’s just an extra helping of ordinary.

Trending via YouTube:

You are the Monday of my life.

Going viral on Slack:

Stop checking your phone every minute. No one loves you.

Making waves on Discord:

Go ahead. Order anything you want. Money is no object when we dine at IKEA.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Three drinks in and that skateboard outside is looking rideable.

Just shared via Instagram:

There is no sex. I lied. You are gonna lay here and take personality quizzes with me.

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