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Commentary:
"Ah, the classic duck and dodge strategy – the ultimate game of life dodgeball! 🦆💨 May your aim be quick and your reflexes quicker, dear friend. Remember, sometimes it's best to let fate find a new target. 😂 #LifeDodging"

avoidance, ducking, humor, life, me, responsibility, self-defense, someone, tomorrow

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

It’s funny how cats have ears on top of their head, but don’t use them.

1 month ago

animals, cat, cats, ears, head, humor, observation, pet, top
Job market so bad, I started following my dreams.

1 month ago

aspiration, bad, career, dreams, following, humor, i, job, job market, market, unemployment
If your store’s bowl of water is just for pets, you should really put up a sign.

2 months ago

animal, bowl, communication, humor, just, misunderstanding, pets, put, should, sign, store, water
Mindfulness is out. We’re doing drugs again.

1 month ago

again, doing, drugs, health, humor, irony, mental, mental health, mindfulness, recreational, satire
I don’t care if it’s cliché, I will always enjoy a ‘small town but something messed up is happening’ story.

1 month ago

always, care, cliché, enjoy, entertainment, happening, humor, i, mystery, small, small town, something, story, suspense, town
Sucks how every girl I’m interested in is either taken or has good taste in men.

2 months ago

dating, every, girl, good, humor, interest, men, relationship, taken, taste

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

My bank assures me my money is safe with them, yet they keep their pens chained to desks and most of them are missing.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

I’ve folded seven page corners of the book I’m reading. That’s 49 in dog ears.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Toddlers are like puppies, they don’t care if they’re dirty and smelly and they both have an affinity exploring the trash bin.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

The older I get, the less surprised I’d be if a random body part just fell off one day.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

The new American dream is an alien invasion.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

Less is more, unless it’s kindness, sleep, or toilet paper.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

I still haven’t heard one good argument why I should stop believing in Santa.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Weirdos gonna weird.

Spotted on Facebook:

I don’t post for money or fame, I post because there’s something seriously wrong with me.

Spreading quickly via X:

Nice thing about dating a doctor is if you wanna stop seeing them, you can just eat an apple.

Spotted on TikTok:

“But it’s summer,” is going to be my excuse for everything from now until the end of September.

Going viral on Snapchat:

All mushrooms are edible. Some only once.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I don’t think the makers of protein powder have ever had chocolate.

Seen just now on Twitch:

That awkward moment you can’t understand what somebody is saying after they have repeated it about five times.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Starting tomorrow whatever life throws at me, I’m ducking so it hits someone else.

It’s funny how cats have ears on top of their head, but don’t use them.

Job market so bad, I started following my dreams.

If your store’s bowl of water is just for pets, you should really put up a sign.

Mindfulness is out. We’re doing drugs again.

I don’t care if it’s cliché, I will always enjoy a ‘small town but something messed up is happening’ story.

Sucks how every girl I’m interested in is either taken or has good taste in men.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

The best part about filling out doctor appointment forms online is when you get there and they say “hello, please fill out these forms!”

“My reading glasses would look good on your nightstand.” -Me, flirting.

It’s too late. I sat down on the couch after work. Go on without me.

Breakups are hard, but have you ever been disappointed in the food you ordered?

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

The worst part of coming out of a hyperfixation is sobering up and looking at all the merch you bought that you didn’t need.

Perhaps moths don’t seek the light, but are simply fleeing the darkness.

I’m literally overstimulated with life. I need to scream on top of a mountain.

The next man who speaks to me will be sacrificed to the gods for a bountiful harvest.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Play the long game? You mean Monopoly?

We’ve all at least once caught our toes when putting on our knickers and jumped around the room like idiots.

People pleasing doesn’t go well with my black attire.

Too many toilets have automatically flushed underneath me for me not to have reservations about self-driving cars.

I can do anything, as long as there’s a looming deadline and serious consequences.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Not arguing with people anymore, I’m just gonna say “it makes sense that you would think that”.

You relax for 15 minutes after work, and next thing you know, it’s 10 p.m.

I like my men like I like my coffee. Not that hot but still making me anxious.

I think the most financially irresponsible thing I’ve done is get my kids to like sushi.

Anyone know how to create an Outlook rule that sends every email to junk, deletes it, blocks the sender, and sets my laptop on fire?

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Starting tomorrow whatever life throws at me, I’m ducking so it hits someone else.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

It’s funny how cats have ears on top of their head, but don’t use them.

Job market so bad, I started following my dreams.

If your store’s bowl of water is just for pets, you should really put up a sign.

Mindfulness is out. We’re doing drugs again.

I don’t care if it’s cliché, I will always enjoy a ‘small town but something messed up is happening’ story.

Sucks how every girl I’m interested in is either taken or has good taste in men.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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