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If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can’t it get us out?
Jan 19, 2025
I always say "morning" instead of "good morning", because if it was a good morning, I'd still be asleep.
Jan 19, 2025
It may look like I'm doing nothing, but in my head I'm quite busy.
Jan 19, 2025
Parents be like “don’t believe everything you see on the internet” then believe everything they see on Facebook.
Jan 19, 2025
Facebook: because time isn't going to pass on it's own.
Jan 19, 2025
When you bury a body, cover it with endangered plants, so it's illegal to dig it up. Follow me for more gardening tips!
Jan 19, 2025
All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.
Jan 19, 2025
Why is sugar SO addictive, and broccoli is just like, “I’ll be here when you need me”
Jan 19, 2025
Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?
Jan 19, 2025
I don’t have a nervous system, I am a nervous system.
Jan 19, 2025