Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: Sex is cool but have you ever had a king size bed all to yourself.

Commentary:
"Sex is cool and all, but have you ever sprawled out like a starfish on a king size bed? 🛏️ No pillows stealing, no duvet wars, just you and all that glorious space! 😂 Who needs a cuddle buddy when you have a bed fit for royalty, am I right?"
6 months ago
Share →: It’s not ‘drinking alone’ if you’re at work.

Commentary:
"Remember, it's not called 'drinking alone' at work – it's just 'team-building' in progress! 🥂👔 #ProfessionalCheers"
6 months ago
Share →: Maybe if I spend another day alone in my room then something life-changing will suddenly happen to me!?

Commentary:
"Ah yes, the classic 'waiting for life-changing epiphanies in the comfort of my room' strategy 🤔🪞 Just your friendly reminder that life-changing moments don't always come knocking on your door… sometimes you gotta go out there and seize the day! 🌟💃 #VentureOut"
6 months ago
Share →: If you’re the type of person who likes to be left alone, I’m with you. Better yet, I’m not with you.

Commentary:
Ah, the perfect arrangement for introverts: alone together! 🙋‍♂️🙅‍♂️ Let's embrace our mutual desire for solitude, and maybe throw in some virtual high-fives from afar for good measure! 🤝🌌 #IntrovertPals
6 months ago
Share →: If you’re alone on Thanksgiving, venmo me $25 and I’ll call and ask you when are you gonna get a “real” job and give me grandchildren.

Commentary:
"Who needs family drama when you can pay for it! 🤑🦃 Don't spend Thanksgiving alone, get guilt-tripped virtually for just $25! 😂💸 #TurkeyAndTeasing"
6 months ago
Share →: Because of my looks, everyone only wants one thing from me, that I leave them alone.

Commentary:
"Looks like being attractive has its downside too! 🙄 Just remember, you're not obligated to grant their wish 😉 #TrueBeautyProblems"
6 months ago
Share →: Sorry that I cannot come out drinking with you tonight, as I will be drinking at home. Alone. By myself.

Commentary:
"Ah, the ultimate VIP party for one! 🎉 Who needs loud bars and crowded clubs when you've got your own exclusive solo soirée at home? 🥂 Here's to being your very own best drinking buddy! 🍻 #PartyForOne"
6 months ago
Share →: If you need time alone, just announce that you need help cleaning the cats litter box.

Commentary:
"Need some me-time? Just yell out, 'I need urgent assistance in the kitty litter department!' 🐱💩 You'll have the room all to yourself in no time! Just be prepared for curious looks and possible feline companionship 😂🐾 #DesperateMeasures"
6 months ago
Share →: “This isn’t going to end well for you.” Me, alone in the house, to the cake on the counter.

Commentary:
"Oh cake, you don't stand a chance against my unstoppable sweet tooth! Resistance is futile 🍰😏 #CakeVsMe #SugarCravings"
6 months ago
Share →: Instead of renting an apartment, I’m going to save up for a lighthouse and go insane in it.

Commentary:
"Oh, the iconic lighthouse life! 🏠🤪 Who needs neighbors when you can have seagulls and solitude instead? 🌊 Just make sure you stock up on enough tea and books to keep your sanity afloat! ☕📚"