Funny quotes » can’t change

Funny can’t change quotes

More funny quotes on this topic 👇

  • And what do we do when we are sad? “Add to cart”

    Commentary:
    When life gets emotional, the best therapy is a little retail therapy! 🛒💸 Because nothing bites the blues like a good online spree—it’s practically a purchased version of happiness! 😂🛍️ #RetailTherapy #ShoppingMood

  • With great power comes a great electricity bill.

    Commentary:
    “Remember, with great power comes a great electricity bill ⚡💸. Embrace the power, but maybe think twice before turning on all those lights! 💡😆”

  • Friendly reminder that double negatives are a big no-no.

    Commentary:
    Looks like someone’s trying to confuse their grammar—let’s keep those double negatives out of the mix! 🤯🚫 After all, two negatives don’t make a positive, just a mess. 😅📝 #GrammarGags

  • Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the undeniable truth about politicians and diapers – they both need changing frequently because they’re full of *bleep*! 💩😂 Let’s hope one of them doesn’t end up in the laundry by mistake! 👖✨”

  • Unfortunately, I will continue to get sexier and funnier.

    Commentary:
    “Looks like the world is in for a double dose of trouble! 😏🔥 Better brace yourselves for the incoming tsunami of irresistible charm and unstoppable humor! 🌊😂 #SorryNotSorry”

  • It’s curious how kids are always really hungry right before dinner and right after dinner, but never during actual dinner.

    Commentary:
    Ah, the mysterious phenomenon of the ever-hungry, elusive dinner-time child 🤔🍽️! It’s like they possess a magical stomach that only grumbles at the most inconvenient times. Maybe we should start serving appetizers during the main course to keep them satisfied! 🤣 #KidsAndTheirHungryWays

  • Why would I date a nonchalant man? I like my men how I like my thong.

    Commentary:
    Looks like she knows exactly what she wants—comfortable, confident, and with a little bit of sass! 😏🍑💁‍♀️ Guess if your man isn’t giving you that laid-back vibe with a dash of spunk, he might not be the right fit. After all, a thong’s got to stay snug and show some personality! 😂✨

  • People who are on Twitter and put intelligent in their bio, good one.

    Commentary:
    🤓 “Ah, the classic ‘putting intelligent in bio’ move on Twitter! Because nothing says ‘I’m smart’ quite like a bio update, right? 😂 Remember folks, actions speak louder than words – even in the bio section! 🐦 #SmartBioFail”

  • Autocorrect has become our worst enema.

    Commentary:
    Looks like autocorrect is truly on a mission to give us more *butt* trouble than relief! 😂🚻🤦‍♂️ Time to double-check those texts before they turn into accidental comedy gold! #AutocorrectFails

  • Sleep hits different when you’re not supposed to be sleeping.

    Commentary:
    Ah, the classic “nap attack”—the moment when your bed calls louder than your responsibilities. 😂🛏️ Who knew rebellion felt so cozy? Sometimes, the best sleep is the kind you sneak in when you’re supposed to be a responsible adult. 😴🤫

Advertisement

Trending Topics

activity communication day food fun humor i irony joke just know life love me need never parenting people procrastination relationship sarcasm self-deprecation sleep social someone technology think time want work