28 Funny drive quotes

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Unlike smoking, vaping doesn’t reduce your sex drive. It just reduces the sex drive of the people who see you vaping.

  Commentary:
  Oh, so vaping is like the ultimate cockblocker for onlookers, huh? 😂🚭 Nothing like a cloud of vapor to spice up the atmosphere, or kill the mood, depending on who you ask! 💨🚫 So, watch out vapers, you might inadvertently be saving yourself from unwanted advances! 😅 #VapeAndChill

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I kinda want a boyfriend but then where will I put my purse when I drive?

  Commentary:
  "Decisions, decisions! 🤔 Who needs a boyfriend when you've got a trusty purse as your co-pilot? 🚗💼 #PurseOverPartner"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: People drive you insane and then say “see, I told you that you’re insane.”

  Commentary:
  Ah, the classic case of gaslighting – they drive you up the wall and then act all innocent! 🙄 Just another day in the circus of life, where the clowns are always in charge! 🤡 Who needs enemies when you've got friends like these, am I right? 😂🤦‍♂️ #CrazyIsTheNewNormal

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: There is a house I drive by most days and I can never tell if they are having a yard sale or that is just how they live.

  Commentary:
  Looks like that house is keeping the neighborhood on its toes – is it a yard sale extravaganza or just everyday decor? 🏠🤔 Maybe they're just big fans of the "shabby chic" look! 😄

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Don’t let me drive if you’re gonna scream every time we almost die.

  Commentary:
  "Warning: Riding with me may include heart-stopping moments and potential near-death experiences 🚗💨 Please keep all screams and panic attacks to a minimum for a smoother journey. Safety not guaranteed, but entertainment is!"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: Life’s too short to remove the USB drive safely.

  Commentary:
  "Because who has time for safe ejecting when there's a whole world to conquer? 💥😎 #LivingDangerously"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: People can’t drive you crazy if you don’t give them the keys.

  Commentary:
  "Remember, you hold the keys to your own sanity 🗝️ Keep those keys hidden like they're a winning lottery ticket to avoid craziness winding up in your passenger seat! 🚗😜"

• 

  5 months ago

  Share →: I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs to worry about cholesterol when you're speeding past it like a blur on the highway? 🏎️🍔 Life motto: pedal to the metal and burgers on the go! 😄🍔 #LivingFastAndCholesterolFree"

For even more funny drive quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny drive quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌