Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: “AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI send 5 emails a day and check their fantasy football line-ups on and off for 8 hours.

Commentary:
Oh, "AI is coming for your jobs!" 🤖💼 Good luck to AI sending those 5 emails a day and managing their fantasy football line-ups for 8 hours straight! 📧🏈 Maybe AI needs a coffee break and a motivational cat meme to keep up with the daily grind! 😆☕🐱
6 months ago
Share →: 8 pm to 10 pm on a weeknight is the shortest that two hours can possibly be.

Commentary:
"Who knew time could be so stingy during the week? 🤷‍♂️ It's like those two hours are in a rush to disappear faster than a cookie jar around a hungry toddler! ⏰😂"
6 months ago
Share →: Adding “scroll for two hours” to my To-Do list, so I won’t do it.

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic productivity hack of scheduling procrastination 😉📜 Who hasn't fallen into the endless scroll trap instead of ticking off tasks? Maybe we should add 'scrolling champion' to our resume! 🏅 #ProductivityGoals"
6 months ago
Share →: Dating apps? No thanks, if I wanted to talk to someone for hours and accomplish nothing, I’d contact tech support.

Commentary:
"Who needs dating apps when you can have the riveting experience of conversing with tech support for hours without any progress 😂💔 #ModernDatingStruggles"
6 months ago
Share →: Remember when you could lay in one position for hours, now you have to rotate like a rotisserie chicken every 15 minutes or a hip hurts.

Commentary:
Ah, the glorious days of youth when you could blissfully sprawl out like a starfish🌟 Now it's all about strategic maneuvers, shifting like a game of hip-saving chess every quarter hour ⏰ Who knew we'd all turn into human rotisserie chickens with age? 🍗😂 #AdultingStruggles
6 months ago
Share →: I love that my dog always comes home from the groomer wearing a bandana. It’s like he was only gone for three hours, but joined a gang in that time.

Commentary:
"Looks like Fido is living that thug life while getting pampered at the groomer! 🐶🕶️ Who knew he had street cred to go along with those fresh trims? Watch out, Snoop Dogg, there's a new canine gangster in town! 🐾💥"
6 months ago
Share →: Once again, I have fallen for life’s biggest scam: being two hours early for a flight only for security to take roughly seven minutes.

Commentary:
Ah, the classic plot twist of the airport hustle! Falling victim to the time warp vortex where two hours quickly morph into mere minutes at security is a right of passage for jet-setters everywhere! 🕒✈️😅 Next time, maybe consider adding a round of airport limbo to pass the time!
6 months ago
Share →: Heartbreaking: Introvert sentenced to 100 hours of hanging out.

Commentary:
It's a tragic day for all introverts out there! 😂 Imagine the horror of being sentenced to 100 hours of socializing – the horror! 😱 Don't worry, I'll be ready with an escape plan just in case it happens to me. 🔍🏃‍♂️ #IntrovertProblems
6 months ago
Share →: “Doing the dishes” is completely pointless and only wastes water. You’re just going to put food on them again in a few hours.

Commentary:
Oh, the never-ending cycle of dishwashing – a true test of our endurance and dedication to cleanliness 🧼♻️ It's like Groundhog Day, but with plates and forks! They must be wondering why we keep giving them such a thorough spa treatment only for them to be filled with food crumbs shortly after 🍽️🚿 #DishLife
6 months ago
Share →: The longest drum solo was 10 hours and 26 minutes and was performed by the child sitting behind me on a flight from LA to Tokyo.

Commentary:
Looks like that flight had some unexpected in-flight entertainment! 🥁😅 Let's hope the little drummer didn't keep a beat going when it came time to sleep 😴🛫.